Our next guest episode reviewers is Rap541. All opinions and statements made belong solely to the person making them (Rap541)
Written by Rap541
Matt debates his health problems and his bucket list. There’s an implication that Matt has skied before. He brags to the hord of young boys littered about the house about his accomplishments.
Queue new credits…. Did I miss Jer shirtless flexing?
Matt discusses how he skies a lot. In the past. Jeremy has a scratch in his snowboard. He wants a new board. Matt seems to be indulging Jer with a new board. Jeremy hay bales about how Matt shouldn’t ski.
Matt and his doc. He seems to take it seriously describing problems. She gives him a report. Matt has problems in his vertebrae. Disc degeneration. My sis had that. She had surgery. Matt is looking at a similar surgery. Dude, I don’t envy you. I hope you have insurance.
Amy seems unconcerned but she does note that Matt tends to exaggerate his issues. The kids ask about his medical problems. Matt implies its pretty serious… says “paralyzed” to the kids… says he will snow ski, regardless! Because he is a man!. Amy is irritated that he’s considering it. He mentions his bucket list. Amy hay bales about how annoyed she is. Matt says not to worry. Amy is clearly worried. Matt goes to bed. Yeah, um… this was a wee bit awkward for people who are happily married
Sorry, my sympathies lie with Amy here. That’s a serious surgery. My sister, who spent twelve hours on the table so she could MAYBE regain the ability to walk and work without Vicodin, despite the pain, never once considered doing anything other than cuddling her daughter before the surgery. I get Amy’s issue here.
Interesting to note no snow on the ground at the house in the vague house scenes. Gotta be honest… I have friends in Oregon in that area. It does snow. I mean, yeah we‘re all idiots who have no clue that the show is edited, but fyi - I have a pretty good idea that the boys LAST WINTER FORMAL was in maybe January, while the boys LAST HIGH SCHOOL SOCCER game was not AFTER the winter formal but in fact was in November at best. I mean really, duh.
Matt does some funky physical therapy at home… some sort of traction? Amy is irritated and notes she wants a lil man. It seems like teasing abit. Amy hay bales about she has no idea what’s wrong. The traction seems to amuse Matt. We change scene to Skiing planning
Jeremy goes on about how Matt is sickly and hasn’t skied. Matt notes that everyone said don’t do it. So of course he will. Jeremy drives them off to ski. Jeremy hay bales about how nice it is to talk to dad. They talk about how girls are just time wasters who can be replaced and permanent females are just for old goats….. That’s some real respect for the wife, Matt…. Appparently she is just a vagina to plow, an old goat’s right. Nice. Can’t imagine why she isn’t happy after you describe women to your son like that. Swho did you plow, Matt? Before you were a goat and settled on Amy? That was your point to your son right? Plow as many as possible and then settle? Oh I can imagine why Any wasn’t happy with that sound bite for your machismo.
They head to a ski lodge. Matt seems to be in pain getting into the ski boots. He hay bales that it pretty much sucks and is painful. Matt hay bales about risk. As much as I think this act is dumb…. I know my sis had a baby and tried for another despite every medical person on site saying “DON’T” because it would make things worse. And Sis loves the baby. And I love the niece, and brother and mom and dad, and sis’s significant other love the niece. Some things are worth it.
I do note that having a much waited for child is not the same thing as skiing..
Ski chalet. Matt heads off. I have skied enough (and Rap isn’t very good) and Matt is on a beginner slope. No shame in that. Now Jer ski boards with dad. Good fun. Not amazing in that I, super uncoordinated, can ski,. As can sis, as can fat brother, as can paralyzed pal, and pal missing a leg, but seriously. Good for Matt. I really enjoyed his comments on the freedom as well. I have felt it. I am glad he has felt it. I wish a friend of mine, who has a scary version of ms, could feel it because we were chatting about it, and about how difficult it was for him to even join me at a hotel for a convention. I am glad for Matt.
Matt seems whipped on the ride home and is worried if Amy even cares. Jokes about buying new expensive skis. Whines.
Goes on about how he is sore. Jer says he will jog a mile and heads upstairs. Matt hay bales about his slowly declining abilities. Amy hay bales ad seems annoyed about the bucket list. He calls for the dog
Next. Amy wakes various kids up for French toast. She demands all the friends get up. At 11 am…. She is soooo mean! Zach whines about her and the friends do too. Hey, baby boys who need wakey wakey? Show me you boys making your own French toast. Then I might entertain your bitching how you had to crawl out of bed at 11 am.
I don’t like the new credits really. Jeremy bikes shirtless and goes on about how he is in his last year in a monotone. The kids play soccer with the pe teacher. Zach worries about his grades and his height and goes on and on about playing. I relate that in that I played on the varsity team as a back up since I was a girl. Zach goes on about Mike’s chair and how special it is to him. Amy is pleased as well and Zach wants it in a place special. Do note, he seems to sleep on a mattress and springs on the floor. He also seems to sit out a lot due to his grades. He goes on about his coaching. Jeremy hay bales about how it sucks. Amy tells the soccer moms Zach is considering Corbin… and wants the boys to head to college. I sorta wish Amy would consider if Zach had learning disabilities. I don’t say that to be mean. If Amy is sitting Zach down to the table and double checking his homework, I’d worry less, but I don’t see it on camera…. And that makes me think maybe there’s more going on since verbally Zach is more articulate.
The Mcmansion. Zach babbles about soccer. Matt asks about his playing. Zach notes he can’t play due to grades. Jeez. Maybe you should parent? Matt? Amy? Zach is failing?Amy? The boys don’t care if they go to college…. Stop arranging their plans. Jeremy waxes on how he hates books and reading but college is fun party times. Amy nags about how useless their lives are and how she controls all inheritances. Jeremy hay bales about how he has no idea what to do.
Amy forces the boys to see Corbin even though they have no interest. The twins are clearly bored and annoyed that the college is like Faith. The RA goes on about potty bonding. Zach hay bales about how its not real world. The soccer coach interviews them. Amy notes both boys sluffed off school. As does the coach. The coach does seem to brace Zach to be realistic about soccer.
Zach is miffed that Mike D’s chair disappeared. Amy thinks maybe Matt had it thrown out. Insert class time at Faith Bible and Zach taking a test. Zach worries, but the teach shows him his errors and seems really pleased. Insert soccer playing. Btw didn’t they just show winter formal which is well after soccer season.
Amy and Jer plot to return the special thinking chair of mike d’s to Zach as a surprise. Zach is way pleased. Amy is pleased as well. Amy can be a cool mom I must say. She has always reminded me of my mom.
Zach and Jeremy play their last high school game. There is cheering. Matt shows up and asks if it’s the last game the twins will play. Amy worries too much about Zach being bumped. I played. I bumped average height kids who weighed less and who weighed more.. Don’t worry . Zach has some meat on him .I agree with Matt’s hay bale that the drive Zach has could serve him well. Of course it ends.
The kids walk off the field. I miss it. I miss the field, the team, and shout out to my coach Bob Kalweit, who fought and fought for us girls to play soccer with the boys. Jeremy waxes about his last game and so does Zach, and boys? Listen to the girl here. If you want it, you can play. Don’t let anything stop you. And also remember, you may find more that you can love. I loved soccer…. But I went to college and played rugby. And was on Ranger Challenge in ROTC, and raquetball and writing reviews for the college paper. Leaving the high school is an ending, I don’t downplay that…. But I understand now what a commencement of my life it was. I think, when I was in college…. Roaming around the Midwest storm chasing, spending the summer digging up mastadons, and looking at dinosaur bones in the field… I hope college is as amazing for you as it was for me.