Written by Rap541
So Matt and Jeremy are shopping and Matt voiceovers about how the family has begged him to go tot a dude ranch. Ok um… I read about dude ranches inTrixie Belden mysteries….. I mean, it sounded cool when I was ten, in the 1980’s. I simply can’t believe the phrase “Please Dad, we want to go to a dude ranch!!!” ever crossed the lips of anyone in the Roloff family.
Jeremy and Zach live in filth. There is really no other way to describe their bedroom and there is no neat side to give Jeremy credit for. It’s disgusting and they are adults. Jeremy kinda mocks how whether Zach and Amy can ride a horse. There is a montage of bad vacation moments. Finally everyone enters the van, Mom is leaving and Matt is not ready.
Matt’s scooter is loaded, Matt in a cowboy hat is in the car. Matt hay bales how impatient Amy is. Amy asks about photo id. Various family don’t have it. Amy is pissed, rightly. I mean really, at least two of the “children” are adults. You need id to travel these days. The twins are OLD ENOUGH to remember 9/11. Jer jokes about needing his cowboy hat. No one seems amused. They make it to the Rocking R ranch. God if only there was a mystery, like with Trixie Belden.
They go riding. Matt says he had a horse as a kid. He says he’s scared of horses and goes on about how it is dangerous for little people. Amy notes the stirrups are an issue. They ride on horses while Matt rides on the Mule. Amy hay bales how horseback riding is challenging. Matt sends Jer down the “canyon” and is impressed. Amy “heads down the canyon” as well. Oooh ominous music Point - I won’t claim to be an expert horsey type but we weren’t seeing a super challenging course.
Amy seems too hesitant but I can see why she was led down on the rope. Hee, Amy falls off the horse. Matt is impressed by Cowboy Rock, which is cool, yes, Jeremy goes up a hill and is impressed with himself. Matt admits to living vicariously thru Jer. Now, not to brag but I used to ride and um…. This isn’t a hard ride that they are doing. A fun ride but not super hard. I mean, no offense but riding a horse is actually not hard. They start going on about poker and Amy notes Matt has a good face. Jeremy says he can read it like a book. Its cute.
So Matt and Amy seem to believe the whole “it’s a working ranch” and think they are actually helping the rancher and not paid guests. No, they are not helping, yes, this is well planned by the ranch. Matt goes on about how he loves Amy in a voiceover while they argue on camera.
Amy hay bales about how they have to work to help the ranch! But there are no stirrups for Amy and Zach. Jeremy, Molly and Jake head off to round up cattle. Matt seems to use a Mule to herd. Amy hay bales how it was disappointing to not ride but then their stirrups arrive and things are fun.
Matt goes on about how horses scare him but he’s gonna try it. In fairness, I can see entirely how he uncomfortable on one because for no other reason, his legs don’t seem suited to it at all. I can also see why Amy and Zach need special stirrups because if nothing else they aren’t kicking in the right places/
Jeremy hay bales about …. Stuff that matters but doesn’t actually say anything,
Matt and Amy hay bale how fun it is and there is a campfire.
They try the barrel ride and fail with fun. Btw this is so not like bull riding. Amy notes Matt has bailed on a lot.
Amy tries milking something. I think it’s a goat or a cow, its hard to tell. She notes how Matt has baled a lot recently. The kids try roping crates and have fun. Amy hay bales about how the kids miss Matt and she does understand why he doesn’t like watching. She thinks he gets bored when he can’t do everything. He shoots a bow from the mule, and wants to leave. Everyone seems to be having fun and Amy seems pleased that he tried but is sad he wanted to leave. Amy heads off to see the sunset on a mule with Matt. She is frustrated he isn’t spending time with the kids. They head off on a steep climb. They seem to have fun but Amy seems a little stressed. They head up a plateau and its sorta unpleasant and there’s some hay bale back and forth about marriage… its unpleasant mostly…. They bitch and snipe on the way down with Amy calling Matt “Matthew”.
So its day five and Matt is leaving and Amy hopes he shows to the shooting. Jeremy shoots and fails. Jake shoots and hit’s the target. It seems like Jake won… Amy hits one….Zach seems worried about shooting against Molly and Haybels a lot over it. He seems ok with it. Someone needs to get him an m-16, really because soooo easy to shoot. Matt does not show up.
Zach is encouraged to ride a sheep. Matt wanders in to see Jeremy ride a calf….. Matt leaves early and says he feels bad. He implies he is leaving to do work. I sure hope he gets hauled in for abuse the way Amy was.
The kids seem down as Amy takes them to Bryce Canyon. Amy implies that it happens a lot. They head to Sunrise point. Amy notes that not having matt is less stress. They see Bryce Canyon stuff and ooooh. Because Utah so doesn’t advertise enough and this area is lovely. Amy seems pleased. Jeremy and Zach both hay bale how they wish Matt had made it. Amy notes how she wishes she had asked Matt to stay more often.
Amy hay bales how she isn’t happy that Matt left… and then kinda cries and sobs about the ikids. She says it is a low point and she thinks it is slipping away and that it is a crossroads and says after 22 years it is a lot to let go. Wow, this is pretty sad all things considered.