Our next guest episode reviewer is Rap541. All opinions and statements made belong solely to the person making them (Rap541).
Written by Rap541
Matt and Amy walk across the gravel. Matt says its critical to buy a new tractor. Matt wants it bad. Amy notes it still works. Matt says he wants something new. This quickly turns into a discussion of their marriage and how Matt wants to trade up to a new woman.
Matt drags Amy out to the garage and shows her his *second* new car. Amy overviews that while a new car is nice, they are theoretically sending the kids to college in the fall. Matt notes one of the new cars is for her. They argue a bit over whether or not they have the money to buy two new cars at auction but Amy gives up basically. Matt hay bales what a good deal they were and how he and Amy have always driven modest cars. Amy wonders where the money is coming from.
Reality check. The Roloffs have a lot of cars. Amy and Matt both started the show with minivans. They got a new minivan. Matt has two fully restored VW bugs. Amy has some sort of fully restored 1940’s truck. That’s before we add the three driving children’s cars into the mix. I appreciate the thought, but these folks aren’t modest car owners, driving old ghetto beaters.
Amy and her girl friends plan a graduation party for June 21st. There’s a lot of chatting about birthdays and middle age, and Amy hay bales basically about how its time she had a mid life crisis, and how the twins graduating means she and Matt will be alone. Really Amy? Really? I’d throw Amy a bone if this was the first time she equated her oldest kids graduating with being done as a parent.
Matt goes on about buying Mercedes and how Amy is cheap and won’t even buy good bacon. Amy at this point seems less pleased about the new cars. Matt tries to jolly her along over it. Her concern, along with the often mentioned marital issues (and they are mentioned every ten seconds) is where the money came from and we never get an actual answer. Jer gets behind the wheel and says he and his friends call Matt “the Big MR”. Really Jer? That’s so… lame. They drive. And then return the car to the massive parking lot, full of the Roloff fleet of “modest“ vehicles. Amy drones on and on about Matt’s midlife crisis and notes how they don’t need another car.
The sun rises over the farm and we are in crisis! There’s a pretty deep gouge on the black Mercedes and Amy doesn’t care, and Matt is annoyed that Jeremy gouged the car. Amy thinks Matt is annoyed that Jer didn’t tell them Amy is all “its just a car”. Matt roars off on the mule.
For the record, no apology from Jeremy, no punishment for Jeremy for the fairly noticeable gouge, and not one word from the blessed babe’s mouth. Jeremy held accountable? Pshaw. I simply point out we have another example of what a fantastic driver Jeremy is.
Amy heads back to her girls to party plan. They consider a bouncy house for the high school seniors… Really ladies? A bouncy house? Amy is all about spending cash on the kids. She hay bales about moments and memories and tosses an idea over bowling since it has connotations of little people freak show entertainment.
Speaking of driving, Jeremy apparently gets it from “The Big MR”. Matt promptly wrecks his new car’s mirror and Amy laughs since Matt is usually a twit about people damaging new things. He hay bales about how the kids are supposed to close the man door and honestly I really can’t visualize how he managed to tear the mirror off by the people door being open. I mean, someone want to help me out? Because the door seemed to be on the side, and there’s a foot of clearance. Matt calls for Molly and they text her inside the house. Geez. Texting from inside the house?
Amy throws out trash. Gets in the new black Mercedes. Matt asks how it is. They smooch. But Amy doesn’t seem to like it and notes Jeremy has her van.
Matt wants to take Amy driving on the Mule and basically rants pleasantly about all of the things he wants to spend money on around the farm. Amy hay bales about how maybe there’s too many projects running at every moment. Matt wants to set up a green house, metal tank cows and an art bridge with expensive timber. Amy is all “huh”? over the bridge concept and Matt hay bales about how he’s the creativity one and refers to various things on the farm as art. He wants to do some sort of Noah’s ark thing. Amy notes he doesn’t have to do 50 million projects and Matt says he needs a project in order to get up. Amy notes on the hay bale that this is part of Matt’s basic fatalism, and why he can’t enjoy any of the end results because he is too busy setting up a new project. That’s actually rather insightful of Amy.
Matt hay bales how he and Amy are growing apart and how interesting he finds that, and the evolution of their relationship. Honestly they are both going on about this way too much to not be seeing a marriage counselor.
Oh look the lavish senior party. Amy notes how Matt wasn’t around for it. Zach hay bales how the parents are different. The school kiddies take pictures. I note how there doesn’t seem to be a bouncy house. Amy hay bales how Matt tends to take over. Matt notes from the Mule that he feels he was excluded from the entire party by Amy. A bit passive aggressive, that.
There’s some sort of pyramid with Zach on top. Amy notes again how Matt gave the party a pass. Now there’s a fire with the kids. Matt wanders into the bonfire and wishes the kids well. Amy expresses more concern about the marriage. Matt gets a comment or two from Zach… doesn’t seem to ask Jeremy his opinion of the party.
Now more and more “Oh geez are we breaking up?” talk. Amy notes how sad it is.
Yeah honestly, get a divorce or work on your marriage. And am I the only one who thinks the Littlest Chocolate Making Dwarfs is a clever meld of the “adults making something creative” show and the “We’ve got something wrong with us and don’t let it keep us down” show types?