Our next guest episode reviewer is Rap541. All opinions and statements made belong solely to the person making them (Rap541)
Written by Rap541
Hee! Cute things I didn’t notice previously.
On the rare view of Oregon, the timestamp is 11:20 pm and Molly and Jake are both still up.
Jeremy does indeed pronounce “Thames” as “Thaymes”. The correct pronunciation is more like “Tems”.
Jeremy pointedly says on the train to Brussels that he wants Zach to run into a difficult situation.
The “tension” still seems pretty forced. Still amused by how both twins note that the other totally shuts down when angry.
So we’re in Germany! Jeremy seems to be wearing the same white shirt he’s worn for both previous episodes. They seem to be heading to a “hotel” in this small town. No one seems to speak English and they are befuddled and alone on the streets. Its all vaguely sad.
Until they find the shuttle driver who magically speaks English and takes them to their hotel. They run off for food. Zach notes that in Germany, no one speaks English, despite the obvious evidence we just saw, and frankly all throughout this episode. Jeremy and Zach both look confused at the menus. You know, there’s a reason German is easy for English speakers to learn….
Meanwhile in Oregon, Amy has a complete itinerary which pretty much declares that the entire trip for everyone is totally planned to the nines. Which makes the later “we are on a totally unplanned adventure, going where the heart must take us” talk quite hilarious. Amy seems excited about the trip. Matt seems very pleased to not have to deal with anyone since he’s staying home. Perhaps that is why Amy is excited as well? Jake hay bales how he wanted to go with Jer and Zach to the red light district. Molly seems excited. Amy hay bales how cool it will be to have girl time with Molly. I begin to see Jake’s concern at that comment. Molly seems organized.
German town.! The boys get some schnitzel. Zach has some fun saying it. Jeremy hay bales that it was awkward. Neither seemed impressed with their meal. Kinda surprising actually, German food isn’t all that far off from American, Here’s some info - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schnitzel. I mean, I was a little surprised that they were both so open about having to choke it down…. It’s not like it was a plate of rattlesnake with the snake head and tail on the plate as garnish as is the style here in the Southwest.
Oregon! Molly is sick, perhaps with the black death. So of course get on the plane and infect others. This is our very own outbreak. Yup, Molly is hacking in the barf bag. Amy seems to push the panic button and starts talking about going home. I kinda doubt that’s gonna happen, based on a variety of commercials but lets watch.
Rome! Molly manages to make her way off the plane. Jake cheerfully notes how she smells like vomit and they head to a hotel.
Random German Town! So they find a tour guide in costume and no one speaks English. Then the guide sorta mocks them as Anglo-Saxons. The tour guide shows them medieval German whores and questions Zach on what they are. Of course Jeremy knows what they are. And then they tour the witches tower and discuss how the witches were killed. Oh Germany, never change…. Jeremy is all “Yeah, it was sad… because some of them weren’t witches”. Oh where to start? See below.
Jeremy hay bales how the tour guide was amazing. I wonder, more amazing than Kenny? Is it just me or does he think everything is amazing?
Rome! Molly seems better. They tour about on Vespas. Amy hay bales how her special girl time with Molly might not be too much fun for him. They zip about on Vespas, which is cool. Jake hay bales how he loved the speed. They go by the Coliseum. Amy snaps photos of the kids at the Arch of Constantine and then they go to the Coliseum. They look at the Temple of Venus and the tour guide explains the secret name of Rome, which is a cool story. They zip off.
Interesting fact - modern sports stadiums are built in the same style and design as the Coliseum. Yes, the whole exits, and aisles and doorways and stairs? Has essentially been unchanged since Ancient Rome. They even had bathrooms in the place. Anyway….
More Rome Vespa tours. They head to “the orange garden”. They look at the Vatican. Jake is bored but seems to like the scooters. They stop on the Appian Way. I kinda wonder if they know what the Appian Way is. Historically its quite important in Roman history.There’s chariot ruts. Jake hay bales that the schedule was busy. Oh hey, someone on a Segway. A Segway. On the Appian Way. Julius Caesar must be rolling in his grave laughing.
Jeremy and Zach head to the geographic center of the European Union. It’s interesting… but really this is all they could find to do? I mean… Germany has a lot of cool stuff. They call Mom and her phone is off. She’s scootering to the Vatican, which is pretty cool. Amy goes on about the sense of history and they all seem to be having a good time. Amy tickles Jake awake and they hug a little. Its cute.
Germantown! They seem to be in a tour group with a bunch of old people. I mean, I think the next youngest person there is in their forties. Zach takes pride in learning no German but “schnitzel”.
Rome. They go to the Spanish steps and they still seem to have a good time. The kids look tired. Amy prattles on the hay bale about making memories as both kids look almost unconscious in the car.
So the boys are finally leaving “Generic German Town”. They get on a train that is early. Jeremy’s hat blows off and he is amused. They get on the train and head to the upper deck. They discuss their plans. Zach likes trains - I have to agree. Jeremy notes how the best part of traveling is “the experience of it, and everything”. So articulate. He goes on about making memories.
Zach seems to want to have a good time. That’s certainly new. Jeremy wants an adventure. This will be hard with the whole set schedule that they have to adhere to for filming purposes. Jeremy proudly notes how he enjoyed having a blank mind on the way to Munich. Sometimes I don’t think he carefully considers his words.
Zach talks about himself in the third person in an irritating fashion and they head to a hotel. Then they suck down some beers at the beer garden. Jeremy notes how awesome it is for Zach to drink because drinking is getting out of one’s comfort zone, which Jeremy wants. Because really, if you can’t hang with the whores, you can at least get blasted in a foreign country.
Rome! Amy hay bales how awesome she is for taking the kids to Europe. Molly seemed impressed. Jake has a video game. He hay bales how he don’t need no education, but cheerfully hops about the Vatican.
Munich - its raining and they are renting a car, which people backpacking across Europe do, and Jeremy considers this “legit travel” and that he is super awesome for getting on the Autobahn. In fairness, I hate to drive so good for him. He cheerfully wakes up Zach in the car with a scream. Heh. It was funny.
So they drive about and Zach is all “we’re looking for a life changing experience. Neither seem able to read a map. They go to Ebsee? A resort? Which all backpackers do when on wild carefree vacation, make reservations…. The Alps are nice though. Jeremy notes that he wants to live there in the beauty of nature. He notes that the mountains are different. They head up a gondola lift, which is cool. The scenery is awesome. Jeremy says they are going straight up into an abyss. Abyss, from the Greek, means bottomless pit, btw. Now they are at the top of the highest mountain in Germany but there’s snow. They make beaver jokes. I laughed.
Meanwhile in Italy, the others head to the Trevi fountain. Amy wants Molly to get love, but Molly opts for returning to Italy with her good luck wish. Interesting independence.
Dachau. I’m a little off put by this since both are high school graduates and Jeremy is saying they know nothing at all. I also kinda get the vibe - based on the earlier, more natural comments about adventure and all, that visiting the KZ was very much producer inspired. I’m also a bit off put by how it seems to be a tourist attraction.
Ew - warning on the episode. Heavy topic!
Jeremy notes they had no knowledge of what it was about. Zach voices over that its harsh. There’s talk of the Final Solution, and scenes of the camps. Zach notes how Hitler was all about the perfect people. He notes he is not perfect and that some dwarfs may have been killed…..More on this later. Jeremy notes its sobering and he needs to look at his life. There’s lots of depressing facts tossed out. Jeremy says he left with a different perspective and an “awe” which I don’t think is the word he meant to use. Zach notes that it made him think. It’s nice something does.
Pisa! Amy takes the kids to the Leaning Tower and they take cute photos. They go up it. Jake notes that its kinda awesome. They take in the view. Thankfully they don’t spit off it like they did in the Bahamas. Amy is all “wow the kids are learning”.
German Minicoop. Jeremy hay bales how he’s been places now. He goes on how this was all an unplanned adventure. He seems to have changed into a pink shirt. Zach notes how he’s all about the excitement now.
Ok. First off, minimal effort tells us that in fact, almost no one killed in the witch trials were actually witches. People with too many freckles were executed because those are witch marks. I mean, if you ticked off someone, you were a witch. If your cow died, you were a witch. If your cow was healthy, you were a witch. It’s not sad that anywhere from 40,000 to 100,000 people were executed by torture for the crime of being in the wrong place.(because in fact there’s no evidence that any devil worshippers were tortured to death, just innocent Christians who pissed someone off).
Second, yes Zach, not just *some* dwarfs were killed. In fact almost all of them were, along with people with Down Syndrome, and relatively minor physical defects. Try looking up the Ovitz family. Gah…. I think I am more annoyed that this was clearly a forced moment than anything else because I simply do not believe either twin had any interest in this topic at all. I will give them props for seeming genuine…. But the very fact that these two high school graduates don’t seem to realize that they and their family would have been sent to the camps on genetic grounds amazes me.