Written by Expressed
This is going to be a different type of review from me. I've been dubbed the positive reviewer . I realized watching tonight there are two ways to watch the show and review. You can take things at face value and enjoy it. Or I can realize that I'm an an idiot if I take the show at face value.
Jump the shark is what people call TV Shows when they hit the end and become bad. I don't know if LPBW has "Jump The Shark" for me because I'll watch as long as Jeremy is on the show. But it has Jumped the Shark for being "real". It's hard to believe at one time I used to think LPBW was the most real show on tv and the Roloffs seemed like real people. It is so staged! I can't stress enough how bad I thought the fakeness in this episode was. How do I review this?
It might be more fun to review taking it at face value. What I'm going to do is comment taking it at face value and then bold the part where it's my mind screaming this is SO STAGED!
*Amy, Molly and Jake are in Rome and Florence. Jake broke the elevator after Amy told him not to. I'm not sure how he did it. He tried to open it before they stopped, but then Amy said he was jumping on it. She's laughing. Typical Jake. Hey Jake fans, that's your boy! :)
*They walk around. Jake complains that he doesn't like to look at old churches and walk up stairs. He wants to swim! Then he's complaining that he's sick. He said he was sick on another trip. I think what he has is called the brats :)
*Molly says Jake wishes he was with Jeremy and Zach.
Jake needs to talk to the producer next time! Fix that TLC travel schedule!
*Jeremy says for the past 2 weeks him and Zach have been traveling alone through Europe. Two weeks? Haven't they been saying it was a day here, a day there?
Oh that's right, he's not counting the chilling with the crew days of the trip!
*Jer says the vacation is an open road. They rented a car, have a map a road and can do anything they want and go anywhere.
How spontaneous can you get with TLC planning every stop?
*Amy and Molly and Jake go shopping for jewelery. Jake hates it. I cut him a break on that one.
* They flash up "Somewhere in Germany". Oh no, Jer and Zach must be lost. Zach said it was late and they had no place to stay. They might have to sleep in the car.
*Oh the drama! The crew doesn't know where they are?? I think the crew better negotiate a better contract next season, haha. TLC must be the worst company to work for. They send their crew to Europe and have absolutely no places booked for them. That's so believeable. Not.
*Jer and Zach stop to get something to eat. The waitressl comes over. She's cute. They like her because she speaks english. Jer says she's cute and then says just kidding. He also calls her the waiter :) Why did he say just kidding? :) Jer asks her if she knows any hotels or places to stay because they have nowhere to stay. She says she'll find out. She's a smart girl! Go Nina! All us girls are with you! How to pick up Jeremy James Roloff. She comes back to say, no she doesn't know any hotels, but she has an idea. They can stay with her family! She says her sister is there at another table. Her brother had a room at the house, but he just moved out. Ha. If I saw Jer like that, I'd be texting my brother saying "You have 20 minutes to get all your stuff out of your room or else!" lol. Jer and Zach laugh. They talk about being two guys being invited to a girl's house to sleep. Jer is all for it. Zach isn't sure.
I think this was one of the most staged scenes in LPBW history! Nina is cute, but she's not an actress. I can tell. She looked embarrassed to be playing her part in front of the camera, pretending like this wasn't planned. If you were Nina, would you walk over in front of the camera crew to say something like that? This goes back, to TLC supposedly sending their stars and crew on a trip with no places to stay booked. Or gee, maybe they were going to stay with this family all along? Maybe Nina isn't even a waitress! Ha! This whole scene stunk of being totally fake. It was painful for me to watch.
*It seems like Nina and her entire family were waiting the restaurant where she works. A gang of people walk out with Jer and Zach. Jer says they'll follow the blue car. Zach talks about how in situations like this is where he leans on Jer the most. New people that he's never met for. He lets Jer do the talking. That's why I love Jeremy! They get to the parents house. Thomas the father is happy to see them. Oh he's the mayor. That's cool. He bonds with Zach about a German football/soccer team. They get shown to their room. It is set up just like Jer and Zach's room on the farm. Two beds on separate sides of the room with a little table in the center along the back wall.
*Cough cough. Thomas wasn't surprised at all to see a camera crew come walking in and his daughters announcing that she picked 2 guys, one really hot guy up. That's nice. He's the Mayor! Come on! This is supposed to be natural? The mayor's family always picks up "random" guys at work? My guess is the mayor arranged this with TLC for tourism. This is getting sad at what TLC wants us to believe is natural. There is nothing real about this at all. I'm disappointed at what has happened to my favorite show :(
*Jake is still whining about wanting to go swimming. Amy says they're going out
Here's an idea. Leave him with a crew member!
*He looks at the pool. It's beautiful. Amy says it is booked for a private function.
Yeah, it's probably reserved for someone alright, for the crew and the Roloffs and this whole swimming storyline is just that, a staged storyline. haha.
*Jer and Zach are eating breakfast with the family. The mayor just happens to be able to get them in to watch the football team practice, right on the sidelines. That's cool for Jer and Zach. They really lucked out having Nina for a waitress. They get the players autographs and meet them. They are really stoked about it.
This is fake because I admit I've seen some pictures on the internet. There are pictures out there. Maybe you have too. It was of Jer and Zach staying with this family. Only meals didn't look like what we saw. It was the entire crew, the family and Jer and Zach.
*Jer is amazed at how nice this family is, at their generosity for them to scrap all their plans and make their whole day center all around entertaining Jeremy and Zach.
For real. That's ridiculous. Like that would happen to anyone else and as though they didn't have this all set up months in advance. I'd like to see how generous and kind Thomas and Nina are when they aren't dealing with celebs and TV network :)
*Jake is still complaining about wanting to go swimming. He rushes down to the pool all excited. Oh no! There is no water! They drained the pool. Haha. Maybe it's karma for Jake being a brat :)
Hm, they must have followed my suggestion and Jake went with the crew and camera guy because notice Jake went "alone"? I am betting that Jake new before the dramatic trot down to the pool. The way it was set up was like a bad sitcom. Didn't that happen in the Flintstones one time? :) Jake totally looks like a bad actor when he is acting like he's shocked and surprised that there's no water. He puts his hand to his forehead.
*They in Nice, France. Jake wants to go swimming in the ocean. Jake goes running ahead, Amy tells him he will get lost.
Oh look at that! The camera is AHEAD of Jake. You mean the camera crew had time to beat anxious Jake to the ocean and set up? Funny how they knew he was going to go running on ahead.
*The twins are meeting up with Amy, Molly and Jake. They get lost. They look at a map. Jeremy doesn't know why everything is called Rue. Haha. Love Jer, but even I know rue means street...Amy is worried that they are lost. Zach calls or texts her. She describes a statue for them to look for. Jer says "Be on the lookout for Neon Naked Guys" Haha. Jeremy's one liners are great.
This whole lost business and Amy being worried about them is kind of insulting to our intelligence. I am sure Amy has confidence in the crew and producer she loves! The two crews must be in contact with each other, I would think.
*Jake spots them across the way. Wow, he is excited. He takes off sprinting.....to Jeremy! I guess we know who Jakes favorite brother is now. He screamed Jeremy's name and almost knocked him over hugging him. He wasn't nearly as enthusiastic to hug Zach. I feel sorry Zach. He can't even beat Jeremy at being Jake's favorite older brother. Jakes excitement to see Jer was greater than Jeremy's and Mueller's reunions! :) This part was cute and looked genuine. Maybe Jake does have some redeeming quality since it's obvious that Jer is his hero.
*The first episode ends with Jeremy giving another speech about having no plan on the trip with just him and Zach. He says it will influence how they travel in the future
The only thing that will influence how the travel is TLC and the future of the show :)
Matt gets ready to leave to fly to Europe.
*The rest of the family goes to winery. I bet Jer had some samples. They don't show any of that.
*They wait for Matt. Jeremy calls him the Big MR. Jer says he can smell him. Wow, Jer is either very talented or Matt has a body odor prblem that he doesn't know about, lol.
Or maybe the crew text or called ahead and said they were arriving...with how staged I think this whole thing is now, I don't even know if I believe that Jeremy really calls Matt the "Big MR".
*In Jeremy's barn bite, he got a hair cut. Before it was longer and curled. He didn't get it shaved this time. It looks similar to how he had it the first time he got a haircut on the show in the 2nd season. (when the show actually seemed real!)
*Matt and Amy are bickering about something. I'm glazing over. I don't know what it's about.
*Matt has jet lag and is sleeping in the van. Amy's disappointed they came all this way and then sleeps. The rest of them do a lot of walking up steps. Zach says it's not LP friendly. Matt wouldn't have been able to do that part anyway.
*Matt does finally wake up.
Matt's hair is still perfect. He doesn't get "bed head" at all after sleeping, even if it was across the seat of the car. Maybe they have a TLC stylist in the van with him. This show has made me so cynical now :(
*Matt gets out and Jeremy comes to push his scooter. This is the best part of the show. Jeremy's ass :) There are some nice shots. Sorry but it's the truth.
*They are getting on a train. Matt forgot his ticket. He needs to buy a new one. That sucks when you forget something like that. I always check before leaving if I'm going away.
Does it matter that he forgot his ticket? TLC is getting for free anyway and if they aren't they'd just buy a new one...or fire one of the extra camera guys so Matt could have his ticket. This stuff is getting plain silly. None of this stuff is a concern for the Roloffs and we all know it. Why do they need to pour it on?
*The family gathers together. Matt is upset Amy planned stuff he can't do. Matt does have a point with stuff like that. The squabbling seems a little staged. This is one of the scenes from the preview commercial. It's not anywhere near as bad as they made it seem. This is where Jeremy says when "the 3 of them get together there is always tension". It's not bad at all.
*They head out on a tour bus. The radio earphone jacks are broken so they don't get the vocal part of their tour. Molly is excited and focused and getting to places. I think Jeremy, Molly and Amy should go on a vacation together. They are the 3 Roloffs who seem to like the same type of vacation.
*Molly says at least she is glad that it's not raining.
Right on cue it rains!
*This part is bad. They are in line for the Eiffel Tower. Amy is going on about how horrible it is that there is a long line. She doesn't want to spend her day waiting in line. Can you say spoiled? Welcome to the real world Amy. I usually am on the Roloffs side, but this scene really put me off. I'm surprised they showed it like this.
After Amy is acting like it's a tragedy that the special Roloffs might need to wait in line like the rest of the tourists, Matt has a plan. He's going to use being an LP to his advantage. He goes up to the front to tell them him and his son can't wait in line because it's too dangerous. He said their heads are in people's butts for two hours and they'll die of the fumes. I'm surprised he said that. That's kind of a territory with a LP joke that they've never went before on this show.
I really hate this.
Amy "says" she is uncomfortable about using their status as LPs to their advantage, (but she gladly did it!) but Matt did what he thought was best and did it so his kids wouldn't need to wait.
Is that supposed to be heart-warming? What about all the other people that were waiting long before them? I'm disgusted at this! We all know the Roloffs get special treatment because they have the tv show and usually it doesn't bother me at all. I wonder if that didn't get them anywhere so they pulled out the disability card. I'm shocked TLC aired this. If they want to make people see a different side of the Roloffs it worked.
They didn't need to flaunt the fact that they think they are more important than regular people.
The part that pisses me off is how selfish the Roloffs were about this and they obviously don't even realize it. Amy acting like it's her and her kids God Given right NOT to wait like the rest of the people because their time is so much more important.
She didn't want to spend her day there waiting in line? What about all the people in line ahead of them, the families who don't take free vacations every few months?
This really disgusted me. The Roloffs are flaunting how much more important they think they are than the rest of us and they'll stop at nothing to get special treatment.
So much for "we are Little People, but we are just like you".
They get to the top and say it was a great experience.
I'll be honest. lol. At this point, after what they just did and how it's crystal clear that they do think they're more important than everyone else, I don't want to hear about what a great time they had.
If there was ever a sign that the money and fame has went to the Roloffs heads and they are spoiled and think they are better, this was it. Puke.
Give me back the LPBW in the 1st and 2nd season when everything didn't seem totally staged and the Roloffs didn't act like they are better than us regular people.