Our first guest episode reviewer is Expressed. All opinions and statements made belong solely to the person making them (Expressed).
Written by Expressed
*Note for this review. I'll call it soccer, but Spirits tells me to expect lots of readers from Europe, really I should be calling it football. Sorry the rest of the world. I'm from the U.S, I'll call it soccer, but I mean your football.
*Back in Ireland, The Statesmen prepare to play basketball. They're confident they'll win because only America plays basketball and most of the Statesmen are LA Breakers, Marty's old team at the DAAA games.
*They're measuring each other to see who is tallest. Hmm. A bunch of dwarfs. Isn't the lesson is that height doesn't matter? :) ha. They want to see who is taller and seem to brag when they're taller. Jeremy measures Bill and Zach. Note: Bill doesn't like it when someone touches their hair (Jer)! Jeremy is wearing a unique pink shirt...Jeremy always looks good!
*Zach sounds like he's reading, he obvious is. I think he's reading a script about how him and Marty are supporting the other players by watching their events. Marty's focus is basketball, Zach's focus is soccer.
*As the basketball game was going on I noticed on the far wall there was only one other person besides Jer, Molly and Jake, I'm guessing the girlfriend or wife of one of the Statesmen players. Looks kind of weird that there's only 4 people on that side. I guess that was the VIP sideline!
*The Basketball tournament has a rule that one woman needs to be on the team. Hello Amy!
*Amy plays on the women's soccer team too. It was a last minute thing. She says she wanted to give the other players a chance to play. Amy takes charge and orders everyone around. She seems like she was the only one that knew how to play. Amy is good! :) Amy scores but the team loses.
*Uh oh. Amy is on the phone and dramatic music plays. I was sure it was going to be more dramatic marriage crap about Matt not showing up or something. I'm wrong. Amy says Marty was rushed to the hospital. Amy sounds more annoyed than concerned. She said he had Asthma and passed out.
*In the meantime (or a totally different time because of editing!) Amy explains how it's a long week for Jeremy, Molly and Jake because they need to watch Zach play all the time. I got to point out one thing. I have a sibling that was on a baseball team. Our family traveled with the team to different cities/states. I watched my sibling play game after game. And that was in places like West Virginia, not Ireland! I'm just pointing out that the Roloffs kids are not undergoing some kind of torture. It's normal to watch your sibling play if they are on a sports team.
*Anyway because Jeremy, Molly and Jake will be bored, Amy takes them to old castle ruins. Jeremy tells us that he has always been obsessed with old castles ever since he was a little boy. And kilts too! And Scotland! Is there anything Jeremy isn't obsessed with? :) He says it's spectacular since it's always been a dream of his to look at old castles. You gotta love Jeremy! :)
*Marty is back and alive! Yay Marty! He seems and looks perfectly fine. He apologizes to the team for the distraction and for putting them all in a panic. Zach says only Amy cared. Ha! lol! :) I think that was a joke :)
*Btw, I was trying to figure out from Spirits original report about the World Dwarf Games. I'm not totally sure, but I think the basketball might have went after the final soccer game. But they're making it sound like basketball went first and soccer is last.
*Statesmen in a basketball game. They do a scary, intimidating team chant! They destroy everybody. Zach says it's because basketball is an American game. They win 35-3. I did notice Zach applauding when the one UK player made a basketball. Good sportsmanship!
*Aussies are the main competition for basketball. Both them and the Statesmen destroy everybody with ridiculous scores of 48 - 0. Obviously there are no mercy rules in dwarf sports!
*They play the final basketball game. The Statesmen are aggressive and too much for the Australian team. Statesmen win 17-11. Amy likes sharing the victory with Zach.
*Now soccer is the focus. Zach is obsessed. Amy is annoyed that some of the players have gone to play basketball. Matt is worried that the team isn't taking the sports seriously enough.
*I think the unsaid thing here is this......the partying! lol. What do you think they were doing at night after the competitions were over every night? But this is a family show on TLC. They pretend like that doesn't happen.
*Now the Statesmen are practicing soccer. Of course Jake is playing (theme forever!). Zach says he's the only guy who is all about soccer on the Statesmen.
*Amy gives a speech before the games start. Zach is annoyed when Matt wants to give a pep talk. Zach whines that Matt didn't show up for anything else and now he wants to give a big speech. Matt says Zach is too disrespectful to him. Zach is mopey and pissed. It's edited to look like Matt wished Zach good luck and Zach ignored him because Zach is being a baby.
*Zach explains this is the World Cup of soccer for dwarves. It's the first time he's playing at the World Dwarf Games.
*At the game, Jeremy is wearing a very bright yellow shirt! Go Jer! He also has a temp. "Go Statesmen" tattoo on his neck. Jer goes all out to support the Statesmen!
*Zach is cocky because they're killing all the team they're playing. Matt says the same thing, Zach is cocky and he's setting himself up for a let down.
*After destroying all the other teams, the Statesmen get ready to play UK 1. I think this stuff about Zach being so cocky is just a fake storyline. He doesn't sound that cocky if you actually listen to him. He says he knows a lot about soccer, but the UK1 guys know more than he does and they're really good.
*Gold medal game. UK apparently score first. The Statesmen need a goal. Controversy! The UK goalie caught it and put the ball down for a goal kick. Adam Romano ran up and kicked it in. The ref disallowed it because he said it was a goal kick. The Statesmen argue. I think they're doing a big favor to Amy in the editing. According to what Spirits said everyone reported, Amy blew up about it, but they're taking some of the heat off her by having comments from other Statesmen players. You can tell it was more than what they showed because there is talk about Statesmen talking about how they're going to "protest". Matt is the voice of reason! I know some people don't like to Matt but he has common sense when it comes to sports. He says that will just make them look bad and get over it. You tell them Matt. He is totally right.
*They continue on and score (my hunch says this controversy happened when the game was tied), but they make it look like the Statesmen scored after that.
*Statesmen Troy scores! They have a 5 minute overtime then penalty kicks. Uhoh. Marty says if they make it to penalty kicks they'll win. Foot....in....mouth....Marty, Marty :)
*Molly cheers them on. Jeremy looks like he wants to play! He's swinging his legs.
*Penalty kicks! Troy scores. UK scores. Zach is up and....his shot is saved. Zach is hard on himself. He says he was dumb and made a terrible shot. Zach says he couldn't handle the pressure. UK shoots and scores. Adam shoots and scores. The last UK shooter goes and scores. UK wins.
*Zach talks about how dejected he felt because he couldn't handle the pressure of his kick. Amy tells The Statesmen in the huddle that they played great, but there were bad calls. That's a hint that Amy's producer friends at TLC really saved her from looking horrible.
*Closing ceremony. Zach says it's good he got brought down a notch. Is this the same speech Jeremy gave when he got cut by ODP? Really Zach? It's good you missed? Matt says the same thing, it was good for Zach to be brought down a notch.
End of episodes. By the way, like I said in the review, not a thing at all about the the partying! :) The "family" part of the show takes away from some of the entertainment value for us viewers! Absolutely nothing shown of the wild end of tournament parties where lots of people there were telling stories about doing shots with Jeremy and falling down drunk Statesmen players! :) That would have made for a fun show! They should have a non-family friendly edition of LPBW! That would boost ratings :)