Written By Rap541
So Matt is checking a pumpkin and notes that the pumpkins seem to be a bit icky this season. He notes that it may be a bad year. There’s a pile of weeds all over the pumpkins and fields look like the pumpkins were planted and everyone just walked away. I mean, sure, that’s ONE way to farm but having had a garden and planted a pumpkin or two, I can honestly say… there’s better methods of cultivation than “doing nothing.”
Matt tells Amy the horrifying news and that he may need to purchase pumpkins. He’s sort of disappointed but then chides Amy for not looking at the positive of the bad news he gave. Because the glass is always half full!
Now Matt takes some construction workers to block off the doors to Western Town to stop people from wandering into them. He then tells Amy that “the county” is down on him and thinks the farm is a commercial site. He has to reapply for permits because people are supposedly going into the buildings and that simply isn’t happening. He’s all “I should close” and Amy is all “lets sell”. This was all fairly mellow, really. He insists that people are never allowed into the buildings etc etc etc. This is where the show works against him, I think. I mean quite frankly, we see people in those buildings all the time and the structures are considered “attractions” and called “attractions” by Matt. Also, when you are buying other peoples pumpkins so you can sell them at your “farm” and then sell rides and tours of the “attractions”, then it’s a pretty fair bet that your profits are coming from the attractions and not the agriculture.
Matt and Caryn talk about the permits. The bridge, the pavilion, pretty much the Western town. He talks to an inspector and then rants in a voice over how the evil county is heading out to take pictures of everything. Because they hate people being successful. The televised record of Roloff Farm accidents and near accidents of course not in any way a factor, its just mean people hating success. He rushes about to bring things up to code. Per Amy this happened a week before pumpkin season. Even the castle must be inspected. He is all about battling the county. Matt waits for the county to come! I’m surprised he doesn’t have Jeremy at his side with a gun!
In fact Jeremy and Zach were very very absent from this. Odd considering the next episode’s theme.
Matt drives the mule! He says the county is forcing him to repermit and is throwing a surprise inspection. They are wanting to look at the pavilion, the new store and the bridge where all those people almost were killed last season. The inspector looks decrepit. Amy wanders in to “listen”. They go see the castle and Matt notes the entire massive rebuild that was televised was a “texture coat”. Matt notes with the bridge that despite the near accident on film last year that no tractor can miss the rails. The inspector notes that the doors to Western Town being blocked was “interesting”. I’m still impressed that all the concrete work on the castle was described as a texture coating.
Matt talks to the seasonal workers about how they are all working for Matt. He hay bales how exhausted he is and goes on about how every year he hopes for profit and implies he is constantly disappointed. Yeah, the pity party over money gets old when the family clearly isn’t about to be turned out like a bunch of Okies. He loses the first round with the evil haters at the county and runs to the architect to somehow appease the evil county. Because again, this is not about safety or codes at all, these people jut want to tear down a successful man. He is appalled at how things have to be made safe. He again notes he may not break even.
He buys pumpkins. To sell on his farm. That is an agricultural business and not commercial at all.
Jeremy notes that being shut down isn’t good. Zach hay bales that it’s bad. Amy and Matt discuss how they may have to shut down the farm and sell it. He hay bales the same exact thing. Yes we get it.
And now its three days before the opening. Matt’s a *fighter* and he hay bales that again and again. He brings his engineer and he’s all “hopefully they just buy it”. He shows his plans to the inspector. He hay bales how he wants things safe but safety is ridiculous.
Meanwhile Matt drives around the farm preparing. Animals are coming in, and there’s a baby lion in the petting zoo. He’s very cute. He looks very annoyed at everyone and hisses.
So the farm is ready! But something could go wrong! Two days before the opening. Matt says he retrofitted and now the county wants to inspect again! He says he’ll do whatever they want. They are asking questions about the columns in the pavilion are leaning outward. I actually noticed that a couple seasons ago and thought it was part of the design. Interesting that its not. They are concerned about the pavilion collapsing. Matt gets his lawyer involved. The big issue is that the engineer hasn’t signed off and the plans he gave Matt are different from the buildings. He’s super pissed at Koby the inspector. Matt is, I suspect, difficult to deal with in a professional setting. The entire theme here has been “the rules are ridiculous and I am pissed and no one should ever get in my way”.
The county people say the engineer needs to give them info. Matt says he thinks the engineer may have been hit by a truck! Yeah um… drama much? Finally he gets the engineer on the phone and there’s talk of letters and basically they want someone to say “I said it was safe” so there’s someone taking responsibility when the bridge collapses.
Amy hay bales how Matt is kind of cool. Matt is pissed the bridge can’t be used, yeah um…
Did I mention all the footage of the near accident on the bridge?
Twins goofing and scratching themselves on the couch in their hoard room. I mean really, anyone ever catch Hoarders and then look at Jeremy and Zach’s room? Because it’s a little disturbing how similar they are. Amy notes how the twins are in college. Zach rides a baby cart. Jeremy watches tv. Amy notes they have a lot of free time. Zach goofs on the cart for a bit.
Amy and Matt look for updates on the twins college ambitions. More shots of the twins lying on their piles of garbage while Matt hay bales how he was pleased they signed up for college - technically didn’t Amy and Molly do that for them? Because they didn’t know how?
Zach is taking three classes. Jeremy is taking two classes. Now - unless things have changed, that means the twins are NOT full time students. Matt and Amy go on about they aren’t babying them but then check if the babies have parking permits. Jeremy looks completely bored in this. Zach seems annoyed.
So pumpkin season. Matt notes the twins couldn’t help out with opening day because of being so busy in college. You know, with their course loads where Jeremy doesn’t even go to school on Thursday or Friday and we later discover seems to have dropped one of his two courses to free up Saturday. Matt hay bales how he is tired and worn out and wants the twins to take over.
Jeremy heads into school, looking sad because he has to drop one of his classes and is so tired. He says “My college driveness goes on…” Really hun? Maybe you should stay in the writing class. He wants to switch classes. The advisor shows him how to register online. He hay bales how college is a question mark. He expresses shock over thirty people being in a class. I’m absolutely positive he has no idea what a silly remark that is.
Zach hay bales how college is different and weird. He realizes there’s a good chance he’ll be at home in six years doing nothing. The only shock is that he realizes it.
Jeremy couldn’t figure out how to register himself for a course and whines a bit in an inarticulate fashion on how he has no idea how to handle the situation. Yeah, this isn’t a shocker either. Neither is the fact that when the going gets difficult, he decides to walk away and do nothing. Wasn’t Jer-Bear the one going on about how Jake quits things when they are hard? Hmmm gosh someone quickly run to defend him since its so mean to expect a 19 year old to be able to register himself after its been explained.
So Amy and Jeremy discuss how he can’t get out of the writing class. He has math and writing and he gets snippy with her and walks away. Amy is pissed with him for being so whatever over it. I’d like to point out that he’s taking two classes which means he is at most an eight credit part time student. And yet he is too overwhelmed with school work to be around for opening day of pumpkin season. Zach is only slightly better in that he theoretically, with three classes, *might* be considered a full time student. Maybe.
Matt plans to build a swiss chalet on the farm and notes he wants his ashes in an urn displayed in various points on the farm. Well. How morbid. But then apparently, at Disneyland, one of the crew’s job is to sweep up the ashes of well… people who want to eternally rest in Space Mountain. He seems to be in some pain. He also notes that he tells Amy he is soon to die and she says “promises, promises”. He notes it will be soon. I would be much more sympathetic if Matt ever seemed to take his health seriously, and if he hadn’t been making this prediction for some time
So the twins are needing to awakened by their parents for college and work like little boys. Glad to see the maturity happening there. Matt decides to let Zach and Jeremy run the patch “for a day”. They continue to sleep until Amy comes up and cuddles them out of bed and hauls them down to eat the breakfast she made for them. Yeah, you keep enabling that Amy. Its working real well. Basically this is theoretically a good idea. It might be too little too late. Zach hay bales how he’s not that interested. The radio calls for ones and fives. Jeremy looks confused. He says he was “just walking into the blindness”. Zach meanwhile comments on how bossy and jerkish he can be.
Jeremy notes they are in charge of lunch breaks etc. Oh and there’s an assistant supervisor helping them. Yeah they’re working without a net! He wanders about asking people if they have had lunch. Zach runs off to complain to Mom how he’s only half in charge. Jeremy continues searching for people who need lunch. There’s huge crowds. Things are disorganized and Zach and Jeremy seem to work at cross purposes. Jeremy hay bales how they have to hustle.
There’s triumphant music. Jeremy hay bales how this was a test. Oops. There’s a tractor accident and stuff is broken. Its crisis time - Jeremy actually hit the fence with a tractor. Wait, isn’t Jeremy the master tractor driver? I’m sure someone will explain how like the incident where he backed the trailor into the garage and the incident where he dinged up the Mercedes, despite the fact that he was driving it, he is completely blameless and a perfect driver. Matt rolls in and yeah, um… Jeremy hay bales how he manned up and ran the farm for an hour.
Zach bitterly notes to Matt how crappy some of the employees are. Really Zach, considering unlike you, they all had to make an effort to be hired, you could take it down a notch. And I bet their mommies didn’t have to haul them out of bed for workies either.
Matt notes how he is soon to die and is glad to know the twins can manage everything. CAN YOU FEEL THE FORSHADOWING?
Amy hay bales how the twins are immature and taking longer than she expected. DUN DUN DUNNNNNN!
Matt drinks a glass of water and says he feels dizzy. Then a bang! Matt is down! Jeremy comes in, looks down, says “Dad… dad” in a monotone, nudges Matt with his foot and then pats his back. Yeah, the time my dad fainted in the house, there was a lot more screaming and shouting to call an ambulance. Amy comes in at a walk, and Molly and then we fade to black.
Yeah um. Matt was on his back face up when Jeremy first walked in, and then was somehow flipped over and now face down. Compare this to the genuine emotion of the trebuchet accident footage and really seriously ask yourself if this wasn’t um… re-enacted? Because it clearly was.