Our first guest reviewer is Expressed. All opinions and statements made belong solely to the reviewer (Expressed).
Written by Expressed
Pre-Show: It's that time again. The season is over already! Tonight will be the finale of Season 5 part B.
I'm more hopeful this week. The previews sound weak and fake, but the content looks promising.
I see people on twitter all worried, so to start the Roloffs are not selling the farm! I'm sure Amy said that knowing they would use that as a teaser clip. Just like when Amy said "we might as well get divorced right now".
The second episode sounds like there will finally be a lot of Jeremy. He's been missing for most of this season. It's the annual pumpkin season episode. The preview says the twins are off to a bad start at college so Matt tries to teach them responsibility by putting them in charge. Whoa. Hold on. Does anyone notice that no matter what the Roloffs do, they always start off doing bad (supposedly), but in the end it's always a success! Every test they've taken, they make it look like they'll fail, but they pass. Every event they have, they voice over about how it looks like a failure, but it turns out to be the best event ever.
That's what happens with the pumpkin season. Matt already said in a newsletter that the pumpkin season was the most successful one ever.
Jeremy and Zach at college, according to the show they're doing bad? Wasn't it Matt's October newsletter where he said they are going to PCC and they were doing fabulous, Amy and Matt were so proud of them because they were getting grades that they could actually be proud of. But by the preview it sounds like they're going to say college isn't going well. I can already see this turning into another situation where people watch the show and say "I knew the twins would suck in college!" And then Matt will say "You dumb people, I laugh at you, you believe the show is the truth!"
Whatever the plotline is, at least there should be lots of Jeremy tonight :)
The show begins!
*Matt is out in the pumpkin fields, he's worried about how the growing of pumpkins is going, the pumpkin plants are burried by fields of weeds. Amy comes into Matt's office to talk about it. Am I the only who now scans the desk to see if there is a story line cheat sheet in plain view? lol. Maybe to the left. There is a stack of Matt's Against Tall Odds book.
*They're getting ready for the opening of the farm for the pumpkin biz. Jeremy sighting! He sweeps. Matt bypasses Jer for the professional constructions guys and builder Rick. I've been pushing all season for Rick the builder to get his own spot in the opening credits. He's been in it more than Jeremy this season!
*The construction guys and Rick block entrances off to all the Western town buildings. Matt says the county wants to shut them down. Basically they are saying it's a commercial business and Matt argues that it's agriculture. There are different standards if it's commercial, so that's why Matt is fighting so hard to say it's not. His point is they don't let people go in any of the structures. That kind of sucks for the visitors. Remember the old days when people could actually walk around by themselves? Damn safety rules. I think they go overboard.
*Matt doesn't like all the rules. He says they'll just close the farm, Amy delivers her line "We might as well sell the farm!" Everybody knows they're going to open. For some reason Matt uses we'll just close as a threat.
*Btw, there something about Matt's assistant Caryn that reminds of Kate Gosselin . I don't know what it is. Maybe the haircut or something about her face?
*Also what is with the memo on the inside of the Roloff's front door. I think that's the filming waiver...on the inside of the door?? I've seen that before but never mentioned that. You know you have a lot of people coming and going in your house when you need to stick a waiver on the door!
*The county inspector is here for the surprise inspection that Matt has been preparing for...so how is that a suprise inspection? :) Marshall is an old guy that looks scared of Matt. He's no match for Matt. Marshall follows Matt's instructions.
*It's funny listening to Matt talk about the castle. He says it looks like a lot of work went into it, but it was really only a light coat of paint or something. Isn't that the opposite of what he said in the episode about it?
*Matt gives a pep talk to farm employees but still doesn't know if they'll be allowed to open. I'm skeptical. Jer helps trot in pumpkins from other farms to make up for their low supply and the ones that died.
*Matt complains about the county again and all the crap they have him go through. For the second time says he's going to shut the farm business down and put the for sale sign out. Amy doesn't look impressed. Matt says they want to "put the little man out of business".
*Despite all the chaos happening Matt has a surprise. Baby Lions for the petting zoo. Leo the Lion. He's cute. Jer snarls. He's cute too :)
*The inspectors are back. These 3 look a lot tougher than old Marshall. Kofi tells Matt what is wrong with the structures and how it doesn't match the plans of his engineer and how he didn't sign it. This is getting intense. Matt yells at Kofi.
*For most of the show Matt has a goofy funny character on the show, but I get the feeling that Matt can be pretty scary when he gets upset. Kofi is feeling the wrath.
*But of course it all works out. They get the engineer on the phone. He says he'll sign off on the plan. Even the mean lady inspector smiles and cheers when Matt says they'll open. I think they're all afraid of Matt and intimated by the cameras. I don't really understand the whole crisis if it could all be solved by the engineer on a cell phone.
*Jer and Zach sit bored on the couch vegging. Defense of the twins! It would be quite easy to make most 19 year olds look lazy by showing them play video games or watch tv.
*Zach rides on the mini little baby scooter with Amy's Charity logo on it. Hmm. That's harder to defend.
*Matt says he's disappointed in the twins and their lack of ambition. With Matt now being an online addict, I notice how different what Matt says on the show is from what he says online. On the show he talks about how he's disappointed in the kids. Online he can't stop bragging about how they are the greatest kids in the world and they always do amazing and succeed.
*Amy says the twins have started college, they don't tell her how it's going but she knows they have a ton of free time. Finally some truth! I think Jer is great, but the guy has a helluva lot of free time.
*Matt and Amy summon the twins to the office to talk about college. Jer looks bored, Zach looks majorly pissed off. Jer only has classes Monday and Wednesday. Math and writing and a 4 hour writing class on Saturday. Amy wants him to change it because of pumpkin season (which he obviously did change). Jeremy either sounds like he just woke up or he's hung over. I'm not sure which I believe. lol.
*Jeremy goes to college with the cameras! Jeremy looks very good with wet hair. Jeremy goes to the advising department of PCC to try and change the Saturday class. He can do it online. It doesn't seem like a big deal. But there is a waiting list for one of the other classes. Jer says wow there's 30 people in that class....I think he thinks that's a lot of people. Wow, Faith Bible was small.
*Zach says he knows Matt and Amy are worried that in 6 years he will be in the exact same position he is in now, not knowing what to do and living at home. I think most viewers think that too.
*Back to Jeremy. He says changing his class online "didn't work". He's back in the advising department, but got tired of waiting so he leaves. Btw, for the record, I think during the year Spirits reported that other PCC'ers said Jeremy said he only had classes on Monday and Wednesday. Either he dropped the class altogether or moved it to one of those days.
*Amy is in the twins room talking about college, asking Jeremy about his classes and the Saturday class. Jeremy either looks pissed or embarrassed. It's a rare moment. Every once in a while, not often any more, I see a genuine expression out of Jeremy. I think that was one. I think he was embarrassed that Amy was on his case about the class. Amy is upset too. She's says she would have done it differently if she was at college with Jeremy....but Amy you aren't! She doesn't like the non chulant attitude.
*Jeremy says he's not really studying anything, he's just taking classes. I thought he was taking photography?
*Matt is getting all dramatic. He's talking about dying and where he wants his ashes put on the farm. He says his health isn't good and he tells Amy "When I die", Amy responds "Promises, promises" Matt rides away saying something dramatic like just wait.
*Overall I like Matt and I'm not being insensitive but we've heard for the last 2 years about how horrible his health is. It was about a year and a half ago that they said he would need to have back surgery "next year". Still no back surgery. We all know Matt is flying around to every talk show, every city doing speaking engagements and cruises. Trying to make it look like Matt is on the verge of death is sketchy.
*Matt is on the twins case now. He's saying Jeremy and Zach still want their playtime, but he says playtime is over, time to be adults. Hmmm...he sounds like....Rap541! Rap's identity revealed! Matt in a bad mood! lol :)
*Matt is going to lunch with Caryn so he's putting the twins in charge. I think this is way more dramatic than it really was. They're gone for lunch. How difficult could it really be?
*I'll point out though when Matt was telling the employees about it Matt said "He" is in charge, obviously meaning Jeremy (Zach's whining to follow).
*Zach says he's good at bossing people around. Yes I know Zach. Ask Keith (Zach's friend and co-soccer coach). I think Zach has a lot of Matt in him. Probably why they don't get along.
*Jeremy seems pretty nice to everybody although he doesn't know anybody's name or really what he's doing. He walks around telling people they can go on lunch if they want. Jer talks about how he's in the dark because he has no idea what he's really doing, but as long as they don't burn the place down it will be successful. There is a good vodka joke to be made here, har har har! (for people that don't get it, there was an old famous story when Jer was 15, he and friend stole Matt's vodka, put Sprite in it so Matt never noticed, got drunk on the vodka, went out to the barn to play with fire crackers and accidentally set the corner of the barn on fire).
*Zach seeks out Amy to whine about Jeremy. Oh gawd. Get over it Zach. He complains to Amy that he doesn't like being half in charge.
*The lines are getting longer as the crowds pour in. Jer and Zach rush around to make it look like it's a two man show. If that's really what happened, I feel bad for those customers. I always thought it was a bad idea to have Jer and Zach or any of the Roloffs have actual duties. People are there to meet them and talk to them and take a picture. I'd be disappointed if I traveled to the farm only to have Jeremy rushing around concerned with the business of running the farm.
*Zach tells Jeremy to move the tractor. Something broke! What happened? Someone yelled "Jer!!!!" But now some big employee is telling Amy that Zach ordered him to stand right there. I'm with that guy! Blame Zach, not Jeremy!
Jer says someone (cough cough, Zach probably) parked too close to the fence so when he pulled it away it caught and broke some of the wood.
*Matt comes back to ask Jer how it went. Jer is a little reluctant to tell Matt but says it went good but there was a little accident. Matt doesn't care. He says they did a fabulous job. Jeremy is happy to please Matt. Aw.
*Zach on the other hand is nasty. He tells Matt that the employees don't care about the farm, they just want to get paid. Um, Jeremy bashers? Please pay attention. Who would you rather deal with, Jeremy or Zach? Jeremy is a much nicer person (at least in public for sure! when he's with his friends, that might be a different story). I'd rather deal with Jeremy. Zach they're getting paid minimum wage. How much caring do you want them to do?
*Matt is in the office, he groans like he is dying and voices over about how his health isn't good, he rubs his head and doesn't look good....
*Matt collapses! Zach actually yelled his named and sounded real for a second. But this is a weird "scene". Jer walks into the office with Matt on the floor. Jeremy seems way too calm for this to be real. I'm having a hard time believing everyone would be so calm and the camera men and producers would just be standing there watching while Jeremy calmly stands over a collapsed Matt saying "Hey dad". Amy walks in and it's the same thing. Everybody seems way too calm for this to be real and not staged, in my opinion. I think if it was real someone would have yelled "call 911".
I know it's pretty bad to say something like that was staged but they all seemed way too relaxed. And if they faked that to give them a cliff hanger for the premiere of Season Six......wow, new low for the Roloffs.....shame on them.
With that Season 5 ends. Tune in for Season 6 in September to see if Matt lives or dies (hint - he lives! He's using Facebook and is flying all over the country every 2nd day!)