The guest reviewer is Rap541.
Written by Rap541
So we start with Molly cutting Jake’s hair. It’s cute as Molly debates whether she is messing it up or not.
So Amy and Molly are heading to George Fox U. Amy brags about Molly in voiceover as Molly as usual is the one making sure people leave on time. So Molly, Zach, and Jake go on the tour with other people. Molly seems nervous and hay bales how she’s nervous. Amy is all full of questions and seems surprised that Molly had no questions. Considering that this is possibly being done entirely for the cameras, I am not shocked.
Meanwhile Jeremy plays with an expensive camera. He waxes philosophical on his photo missions. He notes he’ll never know how good he is until he starts making money with it. That’s an interesting philosophy. I wonder if he’s read how photographers average about 25k a year. That’s not “buy old cars and have someone remodel them for you” money.
Molly is doing a relay marathon and Amy gives her a book to learn from. Molly seems like she has sorta been volunteered by a friend for the marathon. This isn’t especially interesting.
Now Jeremy is off to the air show with a special invite from a flying group. He is excited about photography. Oh we get a montage of Jeremy’s careers. Its delicious. The taking samples of the grizzly/polar bear hybrid was especially well thought out. Yeah, lets see. He takes pictures, his parents give him fancy photography toys, and he wanders about holding a camera taking pictures. This is certainly going to be a career.
So he gets a special tour with Mom of the wing walker job… There’s an intensive bit of wing walking film interspaced with Jeremy muttering “omigod… extreme… it’s a rush….” Lets hope he doesn’t add wing walking to his career goals. Now he wants to shoot action adventure photography. I’m honestly curious how he plans to parlay that into a paycheck. Amy calls him Peter Pan and yeah, that’s pretty apt.
Back to the farm. Molly seems to be slacking off her running practice. She actually sounds kind of sick, voice wise but I might have misheard. Then Amy does her parenting, aka tickling and not really doing much. Molly jogs off with a camera person tailing her. Apparently she ran five minutes. Amy complains and notes it will be hard.
Sam Roloff wanders in. Jeremy wants his drawings examined. Yeah, this doesn’t feel staged for the camera either. The drawings we see aren’t bad. Sam says his skills are “budding” and “warming up“. I notice he avoids the hyperbole some of the fans and Jeremy’s parents tend to throw out. Then they look at photoshopping pictures and Sam casually offers him a job taking pictures of his studio. Ahem. Yeah, that wasn’t awkwardly set up now was it? On a more interesting note, Sam looks a lot more healthy than Matt.
Amy helps Molly prepare for the marathon relay and there seems to be some tension that Molly hasn’t prepared adequately. Amy throws out her typical can do patter.
Jeremy heads to Sam’s studio. It’s a photo gig. Sam asks about the lighting what Jeremy would like, and Jeremy is all “uh….um… whatever you like”. Sam’s paintings look interesting. Sam seems to have a sense of humor, not quite as bold as Matt but a bit of a quiet ham. We get Sam on the hay bale noting how it was fun. They talk about portfolios and it seems like Jeremy may not understand the difficulty of the job, or what a portfolio is. Sam seems pleasantly concerned.
Now we’re back to the running plot. Amy is worried Molly will freak out. Molly takes the relay! Its ON! Molly notes how the night and darkness frightens here. Amy is interviewed at the race wanting to root her on. Amy hands off water and shouts more encouragement.. Meanwhile Jeremy shows up at Sam’s studio in the middle of the same night? Nicely done, TLC! Jeremy hay bales how photography is what he wants to do. Yeah, rumor has it making videos is now his career goal so….
Were we supposed to believe this was the same night as Molly’s midnight run? Or are we to be mocked for pointing out we can tell the time frames have been manipulated? Are we wrong and stupid for believing the show as presented? Or are we wrong and stupid for pointing out we know the situations presented are exaggerations and lies?
Oh god, do we really need to see more of the Gosselins?
Back to Molly running. She’s dragging tail. But she pushes through the pain! Triumphant music plays! Molly makes the race! Amy goes on about how amazing her kids are but they will have to sink or swim on their own?
So Rob and Amy show up with Aiden their new adopted son. There is diaper discussion. Yeah, we can move on from that.
Marty Klebba shows up. Apparently no one knew he was coming. Matt hay bales what CODA is. Matt goes on about how riding a bike needs special customization. So Coda is getting six bikes to six kids. Now I think that’s awesome. However, I often wonder if some of Matt’s low grade resentment towards Amy’s charity is because ARCF seems way more successful at raising money. Last year the gold thing earned what? 50k? And this year it earned 100k? And CODA gave out a 5k scholarship and six bikes.
Amy goes on about *her* charity and drives off with a cup of coffee on the car. She says her next event is a trip to Haiti. You know, the “voyage of hope”. So they put their kids like Molly and Jake and someone’s little kid to pack duffles for Haitians. Amy hay bales how she needs to do something. They’re shipping 100 backpacks. Molly and Jake fill the backpacks and Jer-Bear and Zachie get the free cruise. Interesting choices there.
Back on the farm the bike guys are there to measure kids in the garage. So we see kids measured. Zack hay bales how awesome it was to get a bike. They have the kids biking on bikes.
Meanwhile it’s the day of the Haiti trip. There’s the typical no one has packed until the last minute rush. Amy notes how the twins don’t understand the horrors of Haiti in the slightest. Matt hay bales how it’s a disaster in Haiti.
Now they’re on “the cruise to Haiti”. The little kid who was packing backpacks is there. Amy and her buddies discuss the plan. This is all on “twin cam” as the budget for this sort of trip was cut. By the way everyone is in stylish evening wear. For a relief trip.
Matt goes on about how amazing his own custom bike was that he got when he was 15. I find myself wondering if it was that great and all, and the Roloffs weren’t poor, why didn’t Zach get a custom bike until he was old enough to drive a car?
Haiti! Danger music plays! The road isn’t paved! This could turn bad at any moment! They may not make the cruise ship dead line! Ominous!
This episode by the way, seems to have lengthy commercial breaks.
Off to Port Au Prince! Jeremy’s mind is blown by tent cities. Amy is all “wow this is huge”. They have the little kid with them. There’s rubble everywhere. Its basically awful. Now they are at the hospital/orphanage and its heartbreaking. They hand out sample backpacks.
Ohnoes! The driver has disappeared and they’re behind schedule! And there’s a storm! Will they make it back to the cruise ship loaded with food?? Chase music plays! Jeremy remarks how “insane” it is! But they make it back and toast themselves with wine over their good deed. The cruise by the way probably cost each cruiser several thousand dollars. Just putting it in perspective.
Back at the farm, Matt has the twins putting the bikes together. Matt insists this is a scramble bamble (its cute when dwarfs baby talk, apparently). I find myself comparing the giant mess of crap everywhere and Matt calling it a scramble bamble, while Amy’s charity events never seem to have people running around in hysterics over last minute details.
Matt goes on about how awesome it is that he’s doing bikes. EEP! My cable totally went out just as Zach hauled out a bike. Waiting….Now I see four kids bike off and Matt is all “..IS REALLY REWARDING”. Aw well.
And remember, the show is real and raw and not staged, and don’t you dare suggest it’s scripted, but when you point out the “beat the clock” timing, someone will mock you for believing the show is reality. :)