"After a long winter, Matt and Amy attempt to breathe new life into their relationship by embarking on a family trip to Costa Rica. The kids though, have separate plans in mind. Sparks ignite and one Roloff finds himself stumbling through the jungle alone."
Episode Review Written by Rap541
Wow. This is on so late! I just feel like saying it again because really, isn’t family show time. Also the whole “Who Do You Think You Are?” show was really sad as it was all about Christina Applegate and her grandma’s sad past. I mean it was all so sordid. For the record, I think the more interesting story was where the mystery half brother was but…
Anyway…. Matt stares pensively at the rain and immediately we’re on the divorce talk but Matt thinks it’s time to go somewhere. Matt notes to Amy that they have done Mexico. For the record, when the wedding shows start, I do plan to note the vacations are so excessive that Matt can note they have done Mexico so I really don’t care to hear any bitching how they could lose the farm over the non business.
Finally a brief view of the amazing chicken coop that I doubt very much Matt has ever had to tend to. Matt notes how he is always left out on the vacations because the family is hateful.
Matt gets himself a special saddle to ride horses. I get it, and sometimes the family is a bit cloddish but really, Matt manages to trot off by himself at least once a year on vacations for just Matt – and it’s usually more than once a year so really, the complaining gets a bit old. If Matt wants to lounge on the beach, Matt does, and doesn’t bring the family so it’s hard to boo hoo for him, when he seems a tad selfish. Yes, I will say it. He’s married and has children at home and goes on multiple vacations by himself – all the while complaining on camera how his poor business decisions mean he could lose his home. If we’re supposed to believe he could lose his home at any given moment then maybe the lil vacations to Maui and China aren’t necessary.
Molly is home and a tad blah. Amy waxes on how Molly is studying Spanish at college. Now everyone is leaving and they are meeting Jeremy in Phoenix. Audrey is coming with the family. Amy notes all the changes. Zach reads lines on how Tori is part of the family. Matt is insisting that he bring the pedal extensions. Will this be a plot point later? They run off into the airport.
Matt notes how rare a family vacay is . Yeah um… No. This particular comment gets old. Now they are at Sky Harbor in one of the club rooms. Jeremy notes how he hasn’t seen his woman in three months. And now we’re in Costa Rica!
Yeah this place looks fancy. Matt wants to hang by the pool. Amy notes the kids take after Matt in sleeping in. He seems to be really offended by that observation. Yay, the bitching has begun!
Now everyone is waiting on Matt for the kayaking trip. Amy gets mad. Molly tells her to chill. Matt slowly rolls out. Audrey asks if they will be there on time. Amy notes how mad Matt would be if it was Amy who was late. I kinda agree with her there, he doesn’t like it when people aren’t on schedule. Amy is pissed when Matt rolls in. There’s endless car bitching.
They make it to the kayaking. Amy reads some lines on the nature. Amy is annoyed that Matt takes off with Jeremy. Matt snots to the camera how he intentionally ditched the wife. There’s nature. Matt wants to turn around. Matt notes how on family trips they should be doing everything together. Matt is uncomfortable and wants to get out. Its awkward because really at the end of the day, he has physical issues and he expects Amy to give up her own enjoyment to be at his side… especially when he’s a pouting bitch when she takes him to the oh so physical endurance challenge of a fancy restaurant. Yeah, I remember the last divorce episode where sitting in a booth and ordering was too much for Matt and he had to snot how he’s only happy when he’s working a project and getting his way.
So back at the hotel Amy bangs on doors because they are hiking. Jeremy yawns and wears a towel. Amy complains about how her adult boys can’t wake up on time. Who’s fault is that?
Amy and Matt bitch at each other about the hike. It’s a three mile hike and Matt is conveniently left behind for the cameras. There are monkeys. Matt notes how he’s the medical martyr and how he was left behind. He plays with a coconut in an obviously staged scene. Somehow he magically turns up at the beach. Jeremy notes how dull being with the family is and how he loves Audrey and funny how Jer isn’t at Matt’s side, gamely being Matt’s helper monkey. Matt wants to take the “boys” fishing. Amy is fine with not going. They head out on a boat. The women do girl things because there’s no fishing for girls. The fishing is poor. Matt asks Jeremy about Audrey. There really doesn’t seem to be any interest in Zach and Tori. I really don’t think Jake speaks in this episode.
Jeremy and Zach take the girls out for food. Jeremy seems pleased to be on “date night”. Amy and Matt have an awkward dinner. Matt notes he’s not having a good time. Amy is annoyed that Matt isn’t going to try the horse riding. Amy notes that no matter what happens the family is made to feel guilty if Matt doesn’t go on things. That’s a fair point. I mean realistically, was everyone supposed to turn around when Matt gets tired? I understand his limitations, but at the end of the day, why go anywhere if all Matt wants is to hang on the beach? There’s nothing wrong with that – but seriously when is the family allowed to do something guilt free if Matt can’t participate? And why go anywhere if this is what every trip is like? Because really, this is what every trip is like for the Roloffs, and the older Matt gets, the less likely he will be able to partipate.
Zach notes that Matt is ready to leave now. Amy notes how miserable Matt is. Matt notes with a dramatic sigh that he’s not miserable. Amy somehow makes this about her empty nest. Matt notes “what about us” and we have more bitter separatist talk. Good lord, get therapy or get divorced.
So day three of the misery. Amy brought a backpack of stuff to hand out to poor kids. No one but Tori is thrilled by the visiting poor kids plan. Matt notes that Zach is an instinctive teacher. I notice we don’t see Jeremy with any of the kids. Matt again makes them late to leave. The problem is that I can kinda believe Matt is making them wait on him.
Now they are planning to zip line. It seems like a steep walk up. Yeah this is miserable because I feel for him, but I also see Amy’s point that there’s a point where it’s always Matt saying the family is leaving him behind. He seems to make this about the marriage but I don’t think it is. I think it’s about control. Matt likes being on his farm property because he controls everything there, including, to a point, Amy. When they go to places where Amy can do things he can’t, and he can’t snap his fingers for a couple of the farm lackeys to circle around, he’s frustrated and angry because he isn’t in control. There are many ways Matt could have gotten up there – frankly I find it hard to believe the resort had no contingency plan but Matt does like the pity.
So now Matt voices over how *Amy* puts him in situations where he’s made the fool. I question that simply because he is a control freak and had to have seen the trip itinerary. I mean, folks, do you really think Matt allowed Amy to mastermind this? I note that none of the kids including Jer suggest skipping the treat to be with dad. Hmm. Funny that, that Jeremy didn’t manfully leave the group to assist his beloved father. Matt voices over how very wrong everyone is to have fun while he martyrs himself as the poor guy.
Meanwhile everyone ziplines and Matt conveniently is somehow able to put those peddles he brought to use even though I saw no sign or hint that they had been loaded into the hotel van. Funny that.
Now day four and they decide to skip the daily squabble over Matt coming to the van. He wants to use the saddle but never bothered to try it in Oregon because testing stuff is dumb. Matt notes how he’s never been on a horse despite prior episodes where he WAS on a horse and also described being on a horse as a child.
Matt throughout the ride yells various shouts all through the ride. The scenery is nice. Matt notes how amazing he was. Now there’s a final meal. It wraps up in a neat little package with everyone happy and Matt and Amy have yet again decided to not divorce.
So lets see. All of the kids barely spoke on screen. Matt and Amy debated their marriage again and basically had a miserable time. Folks at TLC? If you are just going to film Amy and Matt bitching about how they might get divorced, don’t bother sending them on trips any more. Trust me, those two will whore themselves and their marriage out for our amusement without the trips.