Wednesday, November 30, 2016

New Little People, Big World Episode Nov 29, 2016

Here is a review of the new episode of Little People, Big World featuring the Roloff family which aired last night on TLC.

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Review By Rap541


Ah the rerun before the new episode. I find it hilarious that Amy uses the upstairs banister as a drying rack/random clothes hanging area. It’s also just sad that Amy intentionally reaches out to Matt to ask him what she needs to know about the farm and he pointedly dismisses her. Such a good guy. In the spirit of pointing out weird contrived stuff, am I the only one not buying the whole “we bought a bed that does cool stuff and its literally been sitting in it’s box for years” routine.

In a bonus scene, Amy chats with her frien Lisa. They exchange tidbits about the kids. Amy seems to not be expecting grandchildren. In a bonus scene we have Matt suffering. There’s also a bonus scene of Matt and Zach chatting on the phone, While I don’t think Zach bore the load of the farm while Matt was away, at least he showed up. Oh and not only did Jeremy miss out on stepping up to take on the farm while Matt was away, he also managed to absent himself from the tragedy of Camerino leaving. But these things were likely hard, and if it’s hard, then Jeremy finds something more fun to do. Point – I think Matt’s so upset about Camerino leaving because at the end of the day, who was helping Daddy Matt out of the van on his return from the hospital. Lil hint – it was the deported Mexican and not the precious golden son. I think per instragram, Jeremy was finding it much more important to check out bed and breakfasts with Audrey in the south.  Oh and people who bitch? Jeremy actually says he hadn’t been to the farm in a month and hadn’t seen his dad since before the surgery.


So Amy was about to drop a bomb, a letter bomb, on Matt. And the previously bits totally reveal that there’s been some sort of fuck up with the farm’s water rights. Not sure why we’re bothering with the dramatics… and this is seriously a complete redo of the last five minutes of the prior episode. Matt does note that if he’s not careful, he could still be paralyzed. But the farm needs him! Because god knows Jeremy isn’t stepping up.


Basically they are ordered to not use their well because their permits aren’t in order. Amy and Matt both commiserate that crap is being pulled.


Meanwhile Zach and Tory are happily married. Tori is teaching and Zach is now head coach at the gym place. They want to do something fun for their anniversary but Zach worries about leaving Dad alone while still recovery. Oh, now Zach is doing one of the private tours. There’s a lot of nattering about the tours and then Zach leaves the guests on the private tour to tend to Matt being an asshole as Matt is now getting into his Mule to ride around because he just has to!

Because this isn’t ridiculous. (rolls eyes)


Matt justifies his selfish stupid behavior with how he NEEDS to see the farm. Zach is all “ I will call Jeremy”.
Amy meanwhile is back to getting into shape.  I find it hilarious that Amy of the cookbook can’t even use the blender. Amy then makes a smoothie for Andre the Giant and somehow adds maple syrup. Yeah um….
Jeremy shows up for an afternoon of filming. The western town is like…. Completely covered with rotten apples. They chitchat about how the first year of marriage is good and how lazy they are. Jeremy agrees to cover for Zach when Zach takes Tory away.


Now Bill is the new Mike/Sven/Camerino. Matt pleads and whines for Bill to drive him around the farm to see how everything is dying. Matt’s not supposed to leave the house but sure enough now we’re driving Matt around the farm. There’s dying pumpkin plants everywhere… except that the field being looked at seems to be like, three rows of pumpkin plants in an otherwise completely empty plowed brown dirt field.


Now Jeremy and Zach are watering a small patch of pumpkins while Matt harps at them on a loudspeaker.


Amy and Tory chat and Amy asks what they are up to. Tory has planned to take Zach to the hotel they went to on their wedding night. Amy doesn’t remember what she did on their first anniversary and thinks its great the kids have passion. Tory and Amy do seem to get along well.


Zach and Tori have a lot of crap in their garage and drive a mom van. Amy has a friend over and they’re drinking vodka for their diets? Interesting. Amy worries about her health and wants to maintain her body. 

New friend Divorcee is all “lets get you a man!”. Amy is all “what is dating like now?”


On the Zach and Tory tour. They go to the beach from the movie Goonies, I think. Interestingly, Tory is all “this first year hasn’t been a battle or a nightmare where we have to fight for our marriage daily”.  Hehe.

Now Zach and Tory are camping. Zach is all “I want kids but lets wait a year” and Tory is all “but I have baby fever”. And Zach nicely sums up the reality that Matt spent more time working than being a dad and Amy resented it and they had kids right away and that’s all they ever focused on instead of each other. Hmm… why aren’t Zach and Tory doing a marriage blog?


Amy is dating and feeling under-confident. Matt is doing therapy and continues to harp on how he could be paralyzed and yet he’s also freaking out over the farm.


Amy is off to some artsy Portland date scene. Amy is as always worried that she’s the shortest in the room and is intimidated. Amy’s friend is all “everyone is single! Go grab some cock!” But Amy is scared and worried about protocol. Amy, just put your hand on the guy’s lap. Now the date leader is all “Match up! Paint stuff! Go home with your new partner!”


Tory and Zach are in the van and now because he’s getting irritable, she springs how 'we’re not going home, Zach, we’re going to the streets of Portland to score some heroin'.


Amy gets hooked up with a man. He seems nice. The Bob Ross imitator is fun. Amy’s new man is slopping it on. Amy seems a little drunk on this date and seems to think the Mona Lisa is in Italy. Then they start painting each other and then writhe with sexual heat. Or alcohol, it’s hard to say.

Zach and Tory get a nice hotel room. Tory totally has baby fever. Amy sent a cake topper for them to eat.
Now there’s a miracle of rain! Except that we really never got an idea of what happened with the water to begin with. I mean,  it was all so quiet. This sort of thing doesn’t really sneak up on you.

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

When Zach and Tory were on the hotel balcony talking, it looked like he had his hand up her skirt. Wait for the cameras to turn off Zach!

eye roller said...

This recap is so on point. Every situation is so contrived , their mundane and irrelevant lives revolve around this asinine drivel called the show. It's disgusting they believe they are worthy of other people's attention, if they didn't they wouldn't pimp themselves by trading their real reality for contrived and staged scenarios for cash. How many times is Amy going to bemoan being single and it 's all about her kids. They are in their mid -twenties , it's pathetic and stupid at this point. Why don't they all just saying TLC is alot easier than JOB, and that they will ride that gravy train until their in rocking chairs. I too find myself eye rolling at every scene, everything they do is preplanned with producers just for the purpose of filming something, not for the purpose of living life genuinely and discreetly.

Mike P. said...

For Christmas, I want a Jeremy Roloff bobblehead—with a man bun on it. Definitely a man bun.

Amy says the Mona Lisa is in Italy; Sara Palin said that Africa is a country. Same intellect, I suspect.

PJ said...

I love that Amy is the one finding a new social life.
And I adore that comment from Tori about not having to struggle daily for a good marriage.

Unknown said...

What ever to Sven

Lpbw fan said...

Please do not give TheGoldenCouple any more ideas on stuff to push & sell.. that's pretty much all they do on social media now...

Oceanlover said...

Matt's comment about how "It never rains this time of year in Oregon" made me laugh and laugh, I am a native Oregonian and that region is known for it's rain all year long. It's the Pacific NW sillyhead.

Sara said...

I have never detested Jeremy more.

LOVED Tori's loaded comments bout marriage. I may have snorted hard cider over her quip.

Rap541 said...

Sara, I have to admit, Tory's marital comments made me smile as well

Ecossais said...

Thanks for an excellent review Rap.

This show has really lost its way.

Amy struggling with a blender to make a smoothie.
Amy at a strange dating venue.
Zach and Tori on a boring road trip - with camping - and talk of babies - wow!
Zach and Golden boy scraping a few apples off a roof but I didn't see them put them in bins and haul them away. That actually might have been too much work for Jer but they did manage to muster up the energy to wave a couple of garden hoses around.
Matt being Matt.

Now wasn't that exciting?

King Nothing said...

Jeremy Roloff: the human equivalent to a soiled handkerchief.

Anonymous said...

This show won't be over any time soon.
Babies are on the way!
Anybody that knows anything about TV-knows that even newswoman who are pregnant bring in nice ratings.
The show has just ran it's course and reality TV has ruined another marriage.

Anonymous said...

Just thought I would mention,that glorious life saving rain was nothing more than a 10 minute spot shower.Pretty obvious when the sun is shining the whole time.

Nolwazi said...

Jeremy!!!jeremy!!

Just saying said...

I think the show is promoting Amy to get out and date as it's not something she'd ordinarily do. She's never been a social butterfly and seems uncomfortable (unless wine is involved) socializing with men. I always assumed Matt could get a woman with no problem, being that he has so many female followers who still post stuff on his Facebook page about what a shrew Amy is and what a God he is. So maybe they (producers) want to make it look as though Amy is the one moving on and having fun, although I think she wouldn't be the first rehitched.

I like Zach and Tori. They are grounded and seem more genuine and kind than the other two. I'm happy for them. Just goes to show you which twin has the more authentic relationship and which is more self-centered and phony. Not that not having kids is being self-centered, but they promote themselves as uber-Christian and yet they are not diving into having a family right away, which a lot of far-right Christians do. Just saying...

Podge/Rodge groupie said...

Hello.
i did write a review, but I'n so busy and I got it in so late the there wasn't much point to Spirit publishing it. So i'll send in some comments and information to help with understanding what happened in this episode, and of course a few opinions shown in, just because:

“Water Rights” I grew up in an area where 10's of thousands of acres of land are set up for irrigation “under water” as we called it ;). The water was supplied by two large canals operated by two irrigation “Districts” that maintained the canals, and serviced the network of smaller individual supply canals called laterals which were controlled by metal gates in the banks of the main canals. The laterals were on the low side of the canal, water flowing in only one direction, and our land was four miles on the “high side” of the canal, so we were dryland. Every farmer who wanted to use water from the canal for irrigation paid the District a fee per acre called water rights. Failure to pay the fees would result in lock being put on the lateral gates. Matt's well supply is probably from an aquifer, or underground river. Now I've only studied the Oregon water resource management system in a cursory way, but I'm not sure they have been doing it for 60 years like my birthplace. As in I don't know how many years Matt has had to pay his water rights, if he ever has.

Podge/Rodge groupie said...

The staged scene with Matt and Zach was horribly thought out and even more horribly performed. Matt went from, “I just can't stand it I HAVE to see the farm” all the way down to “Don't take the keys, I was just seeing if the mule would start”. Speaking of horrible acting, how about Amy (who published a cookbook) making a smoothie? It's apparent she has NEVER used that blender in her life. And NEVER made a smoothie in her life. Yikes. However, it might be a product placement, only if we could recognize the make of the blender. Uh......OK. Oh look, The Golden Boy “decides” to come back and lend a hand. Like he had to think about it. Oy vay, I honestly think that's more than one season of apples on the roof, but whatever. Yes, GB it IS a very very important time to be helping out as much as you can, glad you “decided” to come back. They discuss Zach's contribution to the farm's day-to-day operation, not the GB's (maybe that's why he lives in Bend???) but his remark about Zach's anniversary plans, “Just because dad's laid up, mean, doesn't mean you need to lay down everything” and his reinforcement of that idea when he mumbles his haybale strike me as a bit odd. Weighing the priorities of leaving at any time to celebrate and anniversary, rather than helping out your dad when he has once-in-a-lifetime surgery? Whatever. The “Dude, I'm just realizing how lazy we got”. Ya think? And judging by the weed and grass growth on the roofs, that's part of my guess that that greenery has taken more than one season to grow. Babysitting daddy Matt is definitely a priority

Podge/Rodge groupie said...

We're at Matt's house. We should phone Quentin Tarantino so he can start work on his next movie, “Who's Bill?” Matt of course badgers and whines and cries and gets on Bill nerves until he fnally gives in for the sake of show material and gives Matt a mule ride. Yes Matt you have droopy pumpkins. You can see that from the mule. No need to have your servant bring over a leaf just so you could over-dramatize. Whatever. And no Matt, the County did not do this at the worst time. They did it when they did it. They have an inspection schedule and for the sake of reducing unauthorized water use, they do what they have to do. This of course prompts more of “poor me”. Matt, The County does not have to be responsible to make sure you are informed of the laws pertaining to your land just because you are Matt Roloff. YOU are responsible for keeping yourself informed, Matt.

Amanda said...

Audrey's clown lipstick smiles are scary. They're even worse on her social media. Every frame seems to be an enormous,forced smile with clown lipstick. It's scary and the smiles couldn't seem less genuine. What's sad is that she obviously thinks her makeup looks good, there's no other way to explain the frightening close ups of her smiles.