Here is a review of the latest episode of Little People, Big World which aired December 20th, 2016 on TLC featuring the Roloff.
Review written by Rap541
I am waiting on extra scenes. I have an odd question for Audrey – if she loves curly hair so much that she gleefully describes her hair as afro curly but she is constantly wearing extensions that are straight hair. Oh bonus scene! Rick has come out to be Matt’s illustrator. Rick does comics. The plot of the book sounds like every vague rant Matt has done on how his ass needs to be kissed since he survived his bitter painfilled isolated childhood where he was always the picked on victim.
So now the bonus scene is Amy and Jeremy setting up the tents and it’s a disaster. Isn’t Jeremy supposed to be a master woodsman, camper extraordinaire? Let’s watch as Jeremy crashes and burns.
Oh yay! Matt is doing Doomsday Preppers! Because the prep movement needs this. So Amy is cleaning the pool and Matt is screaming on the walkie how there’s an emergency and Matt demands everyone get on the ATV and then begins lecturing them all on how its not a real emergency but he and Jeremy have a plan to plan for emergencies.
Amy rationally notes that the walkies are silly when they have cell phones. Jeremy loves the “prepper box” and the end of the world. Oh Jeremy, in the post apocalypse, you’ll so be someone’s bitch. Matt wants the family to conjugate in the prepper box in the woods. I meanwhile note that Matt is telling us and showing us all where the Roloff prepper box will be. Jeremy is all “Auj didn’t wan’t to be a part of this .” Matt keeps assigning it to Jeremy, and Tory meanwhile is all “this is basically how we will die, in a Blair Witch sequel”.
Matt natters on in a meeting with the family about stockpiling. Amy notes that pumpkin season is coming but Matt is all “screw that! This is my opportunity to be King Shit of the Prepper Box!”
Honestly this already feels disrespectful to legit preppers. And its noticeable that no one seems to have a reasonable idea of what prepping is.
Matt is all about his list of essentials and wants to have an emergency practice. Amy is against it and Matt boots her and she notes how this is already turning into the walking dead. Apparently they’re going to ring a bell and they all have to raise to the box. Matt is stocking the prepper box with beef jerky, brie and salami. He also wants a ton of guns and curtain to cover the bucket they will squat in. Since they won’t film the squatting, I think it’s a lie. It’s also very very noticeable that Audrey isn’t there at all and apparently won’t be participating.
Matt thinks its totally productive. They go to an army navy store and start trying on helmets. Honestly its so fucking ridiculous, its hard to recap as Zach tries on flight suits. Now there’s a shipping container and Jeremy thinks its too big. Jeremy thinks burying it is clever. Except that as we see, it’s not actually buried. But the episode is still young. I just suspect that the storage container will have some dirt and netting thrown on it. Let’s see.
Molly makes an appearance. She is offered a mimosa and pumpkin bread by Amy, and is excited about the new job. Amy brags about her parties and Molly’s new motorcycle riding step daddy. Amy basically implies that the whole prepper thing is a ridiculous project and Molly is like “oh jeez”. She heads out to see Matt in the men’s crisis center and demands answers. Matt takes her to the creepy dungeon in the woods. Because all farms need a creepy storage container in the woods. Matt is worried about ISIS and zombies. So the “underground storage unit” is actually totally above ground. Molly worries about practical concerns like “is the bunkbed thing actually secure”.
The box is completely open and visible. I mean, it’s a blue metal box sitting in the woods.
Amy has all sorts of canned goods and Matt notes how impossible it will be to heat food and really, no, that’s actually not true. Survival shelters CAN and DO have cooking features IF YOU BOTHER TO PUT THEM IN. If you just dump a storage container onto your property and treat it like a play house then I agree, cooking in it is kind of dumb. But the point here is that its actually possible to create a liveable prepper shelter. Jeremy, in his idiocy, is correct when he states that he and Matt are basically playing “fort”. Because they are.
Matt rants how Amy isn’t getting it and how he needs a “thinking table”. Jeremy meanwhile is setting childish booby traps. Jeremy calls Audrey because even though she’s not coming, he wants to stock it for her. She of course wants condoms! Because that’s who Audrey is!
The box is covered with netting? No, there’s a wall of netting. Amy is also against the chemical toilet. Now they wait for the test to begin. Tory is coming, Audrey isn’t. Amy reminisces over the remodel. Oh I love it – they all get to the box and turn on the lights and leave open the doors with the lights on. Matt notes how serious he is about it by putting on a mini ghillie suit. Zach opens the canned food. Amy yells they need rationing.
Oh look Audrey turned up and Tory is taking her out to the storage container and the shelter is totally lit up and I seriously question the real reality of including the dogs. But then this is clearly a farce to the whole family, its basically letting Matt and Jeremy pretend to be men. I mean seriously, they’re actually grunting.
Tory and Audrey are wandering out and trigger a booby trap that…. Makes noise. Oh Jeremy, do you watch The Walking Dead? Do you know why Camp Dinner Bell is called Camp Dinner Bell? Auj thinks it’s a cute “underground” home. The doors are locked. Also apparently there’s no silverware so everyone has to eat with their hands. Then everyone needs to go to bed. Then Zach needs the toilet. Matt then gets all “I have anxiety”. At Sully or Zach farts.
Then everyone gets up and btw the storage container is totally not buried or concealed at all. Ok so here’s the thing. I am so not against preppers. I prep. I thinking prepping is, when you’re not being an idiot about it, a good idea. The basic objection I have to the prepper storage container is that its not concealed, it clearly has no source of water, and it clearly isn’t off the grid. Oh and Jer’s booby traps are basically booby brained little boy ideas that he smirked over. This was basically Matt and buddy Jer taking a great big shit on the concept and making prepping for disaster look like a bunch of idiots being stupid. Worse, they clearly were mocking the concept which means they are even lower than the idiots on Doomsday Preppers and Doomsday Castle.