Monday, April 9, 2018

New Episode: Little People, Big World Featuring the Roloffs

Here is a review of the recent episode of Little People, Big World, which aired on TLC Tuesday April 3rd.

Review by Rap541

And we’re back to the land of little people and big dysfunction! Sorry the recap wasn’t in quickly. The big change for *me* this that I no longer have cable and went to antenna and streaming so I had to wait until TLC was giving this away to recap it.

The credits now feature more grown up scenes of the kids. Jacob and Molly are still listed as cast. Tori and Audrey are not. We start with Zach and Tori and the messy baby house and it’s mostly Zach moaning how hard it is to be a mom. Tori gets into how she loves being a mom but it’s a lot of work and she apparently had her own breast feeding issues but gutted it out. Funny how she didn’t whine all over Instagram about it. Jackson apparently has no real LP issues so far.

Tori is planning a father’s day party with Zach, Matt, Jeremy, and grandpa Ron. That sounds sweet.

At Amy’s house, she’s loving being a grandma. We get home movies of the kids. Amy does makeup and notes how happy she is as a divorced woman and is ok with Matt being across the way. Chris apparently still doesn’t have a key to the gate but snuck in. We get a montage of Chris being nice. Next up, Chris and Amy doing a fun bar date. Amy likes going out and doing new things. Chris wants to paraglide and maybe take the boys with him. Amy plans to do Father’s day at Zach’s place and invites Chris along. Chris seems pleased as he does a confession. Huh. Chris is in a confessional holding Amy… Interesting.

At Jeremy and Auj’s fixer upper, Auj whines about pregnancy. Jeremy whines about how the new house hasn’t been updated since the 1970s. Did you not notice that when you were buying it, son? They aren’t living at the slop pile and it’s ten weeks out. He says it will take two weeks, then three. Auj openly doubts that timeline. She mentions how this makes her cry. Ohnoes! Auj had sharp stabbing pains and needs to see the doctor!

Back on the farm Matt is driving an off road vehicle. He loves the farm and loves the kids and loves spending time but life goes fast blah blah blah… He makes a point of differentiating between the lil farmers and lil farmettes because Matt Roloff knows cock is better than vagina, no girl will be a *farmer*, girl Roloffs are consigned to the useless “farmettes”.

He lets us know how he loves Caryn. He then notes how coexisting with Amy has ups and downs. He tells Amy about the low key BBQ he’s having for Zach on Father’s day with grandpa Ron etc. He then whines in the confessional how yet again he’s angry that so many of the events “default over” to Amy’s house. Matt notes openly that while Tori and Auj are invited, Caryn and Amy are not because he *doesn’t want any drama*. He then smirks like a little bitch over it. Amy seems rather chill over it. They head off to check out the pirate ship. Matt makes it about the pirate ship being the heart of the farm. Amy notes that sometimes Matt needs to be reigned in.
Matt moves on to how he’s having trouble with his eyes and Amy is all “you’re always dying”. Matt primly notes he’s not dying any more. Amy shoots back how she had to deal with his “I’m dying” routine for years and years. She decides that’s good that he’s not dying, and Matt goes for the kill with “I thought you’d be disappointed”.
Amy then lobs “No. The kids would be sad.” And Matt loses this round of “Snide Comments”. 😊
Amy begins the “maybe we need to reassess the business arrangement” storyline. Boring.

Auj heads over to Tori’s to make Father’s Day gifts. Tori has an overly craftsy idea for doing a photo. Not my taste but I can see how it would be fun. They also make casts of Jackson’s feet for ornaments.

Amy and one of her friends talk about her plan to make Zach dinner and bring Chris and avoid Matt’s party. She’s overly nervous about Chris popping in. Amy’s friend drinks a lot of wine.

Now Zach is taking Jackson over to Jeremy’s. He notes how the car seat is awkward. Zach openly wonders if Jer’s house is safe for babies. Considering the Instagram reveal of the mold problem, probably not. Jeremy notes how the baby smells of poo. Auj and Jer openly mock Zach forgetting the kid’s diaper bag. Nice.

Now Matt and Zach and Tori are out for lunch with the baby. Oh, Caryn is there and Matt doesn’t mention any concerns about the kids seeing Caryn. Caryn is ALSO in a confessional, btw.

Back at Zach and Tori’s, Jer and Auj watch as Zach feeds the baby. Jeremy notes how inconvenient vomiting babies are. Auj tells Tori her tale of stabbing pains. Tori rather calmly notes in a confessional that it sounds like Auj is pregnant.

Amy takes Chris shopping for deck chairs for Zach. Chris thinks it’s a nice gift. Amy notes how fussy her kids are. Good god, Amy, stop making this particular molehill into a mountain. Chris will get along with the kids or not. Tori and Zach are pretty mellow and love the new deck furniture and Zach loves the speed he is moving at with fatherhood. Chris seems pleasant. Zach’s back yard kind of sucks.

Jer and Auj are off to the doc. She’s worried about the severe pain. She’s also wearing a pair of shorts that would make a whore blush. She goes on and on about how rattled she was. Basically, they’re playing up the drama at this point.
Yeah, nothing is wrong. Also, anyone who wants to argue her panties that barely covered her bits were for the exam only, I note that she walked out the door of the doctor’s exam wearing them. Methinks Auj loves showing her skin. Quite the modest Christian mother she is.

Amy and Chris ride off on Father’s Day. He’s customized his chopper for her. That screams he’s into her, I totally think that. Amy moves the “things are up in the air about the farm” storyline a bit.

At Matt’s place, sure enough the girls were invited so that they could set up the food and drinks and basically be “farmettes” to the menfolk. Matt, who desperately wants events at his place, doesn’t have to lift a finger. Zach wanders in and lets Tori know the new umbrella for the new deck furniture blew away and is basically destroyed. Jeremy and his unkempt hair is flung about. Hmmm basically Matt did *nothing* for this party. The photo idea was really cool in the end. The event gets a lil overblown at the end with more photo takes in the field but nice.


Debbie said...

Rap, don't you get tired of being so hateful?

Take a page from Jacob and recognize that you acted badly in the past and change your attitude.

Your hatred directed at Audrey is very disturbing.

And who are you to judge Audrey's pain during her pregnancy?!?

Rap541 said...

Who are you to judge me? :)

Come on Debbie - as a Christian, you have no right to judge me as only God may judge.

Explain why you have abrogated the rights of your Lord and Savior and therefore openly and willfully sinned against Him?

As a Christian, it is not your place to judge, your own bible makes that clear. Any comment from you that involves deriding me for my life choices is you willfully sinning.

As for who am I to judge Auj's pregnancy pain? I'm rap541. If Audrey doesn't want public commentary on her pregnancy, perhaps she shouldn't accept money to display it.

Debbie - since you don't care enough about your religious beliefs to actually follow them - please tell us how appropriate and modest you felt Audrey's teeny tiny shorts were and how you plan to wear such shorts yourself as Audrey's every action is worthy of imitation?

Come on, Debbie, praise Audrey's whore shorts as Christ-like :) If you refuse to comment you are admitting you don't approve but don't want to concede you're not perfectly happy with a married pregnant woman wearing next to nothing publically.

PJ said...

Rap basically repeated what was on the show. Tori was very unimpressed with the pain drama Tawdry tried, and failed,to drum up.
I totally see Zach and Tori's point about parenthood being far more work than most people realize. Most people with their first kid have a highly romanticized vision not knowing it's really 18+ years of slave labor on their part. Reality is a big, nasty shock. I'm convinced that is why we are hard wired to think babies of any kind are fabulous, otherwise we'd just leave 'em on a rock somewhere and walk away.

I'm delighted that Amy is finding happiness outside of her kuds and is so willing to share them with Matt. He needs to grow up and do the same. Didn't much like him treating his daughters-in-law like maids.

Paula said...

@Debbie, you are spot on.

Rap should be classified as a hate monger against Christians. Rap hates on Jeremy and Audrey for no other reason than they are good Christians who sing the praises of Jesus.

podge/rodge groupie said...

Well done Rap. Thanks again. You make me actually want to watch again. Why, I do not know.

Debbie, don't you get tired of watching tis blog like a vulture ( I did not now you ceould set up notifications) so you can be the first to jump on Rap541 for the review that you are just too tired or self-righteous to do yourself?

And who are you to judge (yes, you are judging) Rap's efforts and observations as being hateful?

I don't have satellite anymore either, so I'll mosey on over to TLC and see what all the fuss is about. Unfortunately Spirit, my reviews won't get in any earlier that Rap's.

Rap541 said...

Paula - Any opinion on the show?

Did you think Audrey's teeny tiny "Praise Jesus! Praise my ass!" shorts were good Christian modest clothes?

I said something hateful about her shorts - pleased tell the public world that you disagree and think Audrey's shorts were Christ-like and praise worthy by you.

Come on Paula - am I wrong about Audrey's whore shorts?

Tell me how Jesus loving her slutshorts were and how you will make sure you send your daughter out into the world dressed as Christian as Audrey. :)

Rap541 said...

And Paula, Debbie - maybe it's time a Christian stepped up to recap? All you two do is bitch about me, well, why don't you show me how well *you* express your opinions.

Oh right, you refuse to have any real opinions - thats why neither of you will explain publically whether you genuinely, hand on the bible swearing on Jesus's love, approve of Audrey's skanty panty "going out in public to the doctor's" outfit.

Funny how not one Christian has the balls to recap the show, and all you can do is bitch and moan how you hate me... frankly since neither of you actually commented on the recap or anything said in the recap, and just bitched how you *hate me*, I am genuinely perplexed as to why you're being allowed to comment at all since you both did nothing but personally attack me.

Did either of you even watch the show? You know, where Matt joyfully hugged his new fuck, Caryn? Where Audrey pranced to the doctor in her skanty panties for Jesus?

Rap541 said...

PJ - it's interesting that Amy does seem to be finding happiness. I also notice that she seems really concerned about how the kids feel about her "after divorce".

I didn't like the daughter in laws being treated like maids because I don't like the narrative of "the kids always have their events at Amy's because the house is bigger". When no, while I am sure that comes into play at times, Matt's shown again and again he can have a large group of people hang out at his place.

The problem he doesn't seem to realize is that he expects someone else to do all the work. Amy actually helps with party set up and makes special treats and doesn't invite the daughter in laws purely to wait on guests.

Matt's also on record bitching on facebook that he'd getting a negative edit so I do wonder what this season will look like.

PJ said...

Ya know its hysterical how fast you christians jump to " you disagree with us, thats discrimination" when you'd happily wipe the rest of us off the face of the Earth. Hypocrites.
Zach didn't have a super father figure so I think he's doing great.

Eye Roller said...

Welcome back Rap! Okay,so the Roloffs are back with a new season although it's literally three weeks later in real time since last season? Are TLC caleras foloowing this crew year round now? So we see that neithet son is employed outside of reality tv and Audrey had a sharp pain two weeks ago that lastef an hour! Oh the drama and suspense of it all?

Can Jeremy come off any more douchey and lethargic than in this episode? Audrey thinks he's "hilarious" (since when is he ever funny, boring yes,but funny ?) and Zach takes the brunt of his teasing strangely well.
Amy and Chris look cute and Matt wants to be free of the farm and Amy, but knows that TLC will not give him a show about his antiquing adventures with Karen.

Audrey's condoms said...

Preach!!! Your comments about kids is so on point. Parenting a baby is probably the least challenging aspect of raising a child. I wish people, including the Roloffs and Duggars, stop fetishizing the baby stage of parenting instead of the real challenges of raising children and teens.Not one of these people acknowlege anything outside of a poopy diaper and baby outfits.

Jobless Jer said...

Jeremy is beginning to crack under his pompous exterior, posing as the perfect son, husband, and provider. There is a listless, insecure and bored man boy lurking under that fascade of a unemployed faux handyman. This lot is a pathetic bunch harping on deck furniture and baby outfits while lounging on lazybboy chairs without any mention of work obligations or adult type responsibilities.

Sacred Ground said...

Every Roloff episode regurtitates the same mundane everyday crap that no person rooted in reality would think interesting to say to others in person, much less on camera:

Audrey: I had a sensation two weeks ago during preganancy. I hope everything is okay, and as it turns out, it was nothing. Did I mention for the 56th time I'm 29 weeks pregnant?

Jeremy: "Audrey needs a home to bring her baby her to, it's a whirlwind. I don't have a job, but I'm on tv."

Zach: Being a dad is hard and I still can't do stuff, and I want more kids for Tori to have and TLC to film."

Matt: Divorce is hard...Pirate ship...F#!k the farm, I'm getting too old.

Amy: Second act...I like Chris...Divorce sucks, man.

Melissa Ingalls said...

Good grief, I’m a very devout Christian and I think Rap is so funny. I still watch this show so I can read this blog. There is zero “hate” here, and it all has nothing to do with Christians! Why conflate? This family knows that they’re offering up conflict for us to dine on in a snarky way. Nobody wants to watch a perfect family being perfect...Rap...carry on my friend.

Anonymous said...

Do the Roloffs only have these get togethers and parties as an excuse to film contentfor the show, or do they ever do anything as a family unit without cameras around. It's like they only party for pay.

I hope Chris moves in with Amy and Jacob and his new bride never move out of her house and live in her attic forever!

Over/under on how long before Audrey realizes she signed her life away to the ultimate unemployed slacker.

Tampon Flask said...

Why does Jeremy look like he still has pillow creases on his face from just waking up before every scene? Wake up Jer, you are about to be a dad and you've been married a few years.

Are we expected to believe Jeremy can juggle a full time job AND a compete home remodel (by himself) in two weeks, no less?! Who knew Jeremy could excel in middle school soccer and kitchen appliance installation!

M said...

Anyone else notice how many wine bottles did Amy have in her kitchen?

Jeremy-curl said...

Rap, I think you can watch the episodes on the TLC website so you have that option for your recaps if you don't want to wait for the streaming...

It's strange to watch knowing that Jacob and his soon to be bride are living in Amy's house but you don't see a trace of them anywhere, not even in the background of these 4 generation birthdays and bbqs and baby showers and little people world cup soccer viewing parties.

When over 50% of what is discussed on a reality show is about blow out diapers and how often your baby kicks in your tummy, it's time find another career.

Ann said...

Nailed it. Tori and Zack are not even likeable anymore. Tori with all her cliches, milk drunk, blow out, hey babe, dwarf this dwarf that, she is like a walking/talking mother magazine. And why is she permanently hunched over. Jeremy has a ride awakening when this gravy train ends. And are we really supposed to believe there is not a team of Mexicans probably loaned out from the farm doing his remodel. Jeremy writing that to do list, wow, he writes like a 6 yr old. And him and Audi are writing a book. That is beyond laughable

PJ said...

What is foing on with Tawdry's hair? It looks like she went through a tornado weeks ago and never combed it.
I have no kids but don't coyples usually have some sort of plan for their posy birth life? Tori took a years leave to be with Jackson and Tawdry doesn't have a clue what she'll be doing in three months?

Soup Chef said...

@Audrey's Condoms:
I love your remark about the baby stage vs. the rest of parenting. I'd happily take care of a stadium full of babies rather than deal with one 16 year old.

tictac said...

Well another season starts and nothing changes. Half-awake Jer is still unemployed and useless. Auj still unemployed ,useless and pregnant. Zach is still unemployed and frazzled about everything. Tori, either on lengthy leave or now unemployed and trying to raise both of her dwarfs. Amy, more interested in Chris than the farm and the family, and still surprised she is actually dating. Chris, really more interested in the farm, pool and other amenities it supplies like TLC money, than he is Amy. Matt, still consumed with running the farm, coming up with grand plans and ideas, and hiring laborers to do all the work. Caryn, still overly schmoozing with Matt and just hoping her name is in the will.

Davies said...

I really wonder what Jeremy would be doing career-wise if LPBW never existed. What about when their fame fades? Have they even thought about a need for a back up plan? They are so far removed from reality. Let's see them work shift work (or even just a fulltime job), renovate a home, raise a baby, worry about money and maintain a marriage - like the rest of us.

ann said...

I think she is realizing this and is milking their reality fame as fast as she can. It is so obvious she leads him around by the nose. Jeremy is a child play acting as an adult. I say in about 10 yrs they will be putting out how to uncouple the new Christian way.

pj said...

Perhaps you and Paula should try submitting your own review(s) if you feel Rap is so unfair.
But please leave the religion out of it since it's not part of the shows.

J45 said...

Davies, I have to wonder if Auj would even be married to Jer without LPBW. Zach and Tori’s relationship was built on Tori working at the Farm and the two of them spending a lot of time together from that and on top of that. Zach and Tori also both appeared to really want kids (i.e. Jackson).

Jer and Auj’s relationship was formed in university. But, I don’t see Jer using his degree anymore. Which is funny because most people who pursue hobby degrees are extremely passionate, that’s why they had the courage to pursue a hobby degree in the first place. I just don’t see what’s keeping Jer and Auj’s relationship going besides the show money and (now) Ember. And, aside from passing comments, I didn’t see Jer or Auj too into the idea of parenting before they conceived.

Kathy said...

I don't see Auj and Jer being together forever or even 5 years.

Pumpkin hugger said...

Why would these people allow cameras in when they are meeting Amys boyfriend or the cliche sonogram doctor's visit. These people are creepy and lazy because they rather put (pimp out) their baby's life on tv than get a real job (without cameras and real) to maintain their lifestyle of free products and self promotion.

Eileen said...

Tawdry Problems said...

To really emphasize how out of touch with reality these “reality” “stars” are, we have a conversation with philosofarmer Jer and shorty mcshort wearer Tawdry on wondering if she will be just taking care of the baby or working and taking care of the baby in three months. All in the midst of remodeling a half a million dollar home they just purchased. Really makes my every day problems like childcare, paying the mortgage, putting food on the table seem so silly!

Ann said...

Lol so true. And tori walking with her. Baby and toddler is hilarious.

Ecossais said...

I think Auj and Jer only wanted a baby to keep the TLC gravy train flowing.

Ecossais said...

@Pumpkin Hugger
The "why" is very simple. They are TLC/camera/publicity seeking whores who couldn't hold/get a real job if they tried.
Their jobs right now is being overpaid terrible actors. I've seen better acting at a high school play.

Always More Condoms said...

So true.Jeremy made that obvious with his creepy comments about "getting the ball rolling" and Tori/ Zack putting the pressure on with their baby. I bet he had no idea what to do or how to keep Audrey engaged in him, so getting pregnant is the answer to their boredom with each other...add a kid when you run out of ideas.

Roxy said...

Her and auj are not very smart give it time and they will be worrying about the same things, but will have the added humiliation of no work history when trying to find employment. Believe me this gravy train is about to end and I doubt the have any money saved.

Suzy B said...

I guess we are not seeing Molly and Joel's wedding. The show picked up after that and nothing, zip, nada. Good for her for keeping private life private.

Cindi Gehl said...

Is anyone so sick of how terribly Amy talks about Matt and Caryn? They don’t waste their time talking badly about her. Amy needs to realize the farm and everything involved was Matt’s idea and there were plenty of times she battled him on progress. She claims to be such a good Christian. She needs to let it go and let Matt finally enjoy his life. She made his married life miserable enough.